The Art of Death

Chapter 4

Song: Ribs by Lorde

Everlee remembers the pain. A pain so suffocating that the world around her had dulled to a lifeless color only appeased by the presence of Nomi. But Nomi couldn't be her world. Not anymore. So Everlee rested her thin hand in Maddox's scarred palm and allows him to burden her pain. He does so without any hesitation.

As soon as she rested her hand in his, she laughed. A real laugh, not one forced from the persona she conceived to make herself seem like enough. The pain she felt, the suffocating darkness that threatened to drown her, was gone. Merely a whisper in the wind. She turns to Maddox, her green eyes glittering in the light.

Maddox can't help the grin that tugs at his lips. She looks entirely peaceful. He hates him for what he has to do next.

Everlee glances around them. Maddox has whisked them off to some sort of forest. They stand in a clearing, the sun directly hitting them. Even in Death, she can feel the warmth. As if remembering what Maddox promised, she lifts her pale hand to touch her head. Still bald. She turns to Maddox, confusion written across her face. He's advancing towards her, quickly. She takes a step back, her confusion growing. She just had her hair back an instant ago.

"What's going on?" She chokes out as he reaches his large hands out to her. He rests them on either side of her temples, his almond eyes peering into hers.

His gaze is so intense that Everlee wonders if eyes are really the windows of the souls.

"I promise you will get your peace. Just be strong one more time, Everlee. One last time."

And with that, Everlee is whisked away into her raging memories.

Everlee is three. Recovering from her first near-death experience. Ever since the accident, Everlee's parents have treated her like she was going to break at any moment. That her scars on her exterior represented the fragility of her heart. But Everlee was only three. She did not know that she was forming scars so deep that no one else would be able to see them.

At the age four, Everlee is careless. Climbing trees, wading into streams, and running through parking lots barely glancing at the life around her. This kind of carelessness got her into the mess in the first place but her wild heart could not be tamed by trauma. Her parents followed after her, cleaning up the messes she left behind. They never complained, they were just happy to see their daughter smiling. Unlike Everlee, their hearts were tamed by the trauma. So they held her close at night, whispering how sorry they were and how they would be better. But Everlee remained wild and careless. Until Everlee reached six.

Everlee gasps, her head reeling. She blinks, Maddox coming back into focus. His eyes remained focused on hers and she can see her pain reflected in his. She's suffocating again. She cannot escape the darkness.

At age six, Everlee's flame begins to fade. She discovers that people are cruel. Even at six, Everlee can see that the world she lives in is not a kind one. But she has hope that she can make it a kinder one. Everlee pushes past the taunts of her looks, her fiery red hair that seems like a omen from the Devil himself, the pushing and pulling of her arms, and the stones thrown at her during her walks from and to school. She doesn't understand why kids are so cruel to her. Why no one wants to be friends with her. She's a bit odd but she thought being different was interesting. At age six, Everlee did not know that being different in this world was an uphill battle that one could never win.

At age eight, Everlee buys her first book with her own money. It changes her world. She didn't realize she was missing something, a piece of herself, until she started reading. Only then, could her wild heart calm. Only then, did she find her first real friends. She stopped trying to make friends at school. They didn't matter anyways, she'd outgrow them but she'd never outgrow the worlds she discovered through books. They were consistent—a reminder that she would always have a place to go to when she felt sad. At age eight, Everlee did not think this sadness that shrouded her everyday would follow her in her later years. She thought that elementary school was just difficult for a girl who was a bit odd.