Bloody Love (An Attack on Titan Fan Fiction)

Chapter 12 ~ Just a Little too Long

Year 849

Adelae's P.O.V

God, I hate these meetings that the Commander always sets up for the squad leaders. It doesn't matter who you are, if you're in charge of a small group of people, you have to come. That is the fact I hate most of all.
I always sit at one of the farthest corners of the long table, to avoid being told to give ideas in front of people. I'm a fighter, not a public speaker.
Erwin became the 13th Commander a while ago, about a year now, I think. Levi is Lance Corporal now as well. Sure he hasn't been here too long, but he deserves it nonetheless.
I take a penknife that I got as a random gift from Solomon when I was much younger, out of my jacket pocket and start to fiddle with it below the tabletop. I listen distantly to Erwin's whole plan for our next expedition outside of Wall Rose. I look up from the knife to see most of the squad leaders look fairly bored and uninterested, Levi looking drastically more bored than usual.
Although bored, he looks really good. Chiselled features, almost gleaming raven-black hair, but even better, his eyes. His steel-coloured, striking eyes.
No, Adelae! Stop, you can't think about one of your superiors like that! It's disrespectful. I scold myself in my head. Not to mention, he's your friend!
I slightly shake my head and put the knife back into my pocket. I might as well pay more attention to the meeting. I scan my eyes around the room, everyone and everything exactly the same. Except for one thing; it was so non-ordinary that I had to look twice.
When I look again, it's Levi. He's looking at me but his eyes aren't cold, they're almost... warm. My cheeks feel hot with blush and I can't help but cover them to try and not show my embarrassment.
I look back at him and he's still staring, it feels like it's been too long, but he quickly turns his attention back to the meeting. I take that as a sign to do the same.
The meeting ended a couple minutes after that. I've decided to go and take a bath, I haven't felt relaxed in days, I might as well. There are a couple of rooms with baths in them at the dorms, so I take the hallway that connects Survey Corps H.Q. and the dorm area.
As I reach the bathing rooms I see that both are open, but I don't go in yet, I go to the stone room in between them that has water boiling in small cauldrons.
I grab two in both hands, take a towel from the stack in the corner with my teeth and walk back to a room. Steam fills the room as soon as I dump the water into the metal tub. I open the small, high window so the steam can clear.
Steam always puts me on edge, wether it comes from a titan's body or not. Just a sense of habit now, no going back from it.
I remove my jacket from my body and gently place it on the floor. Then I go with the annoying straps, taking them off is the easy part, putting them on is the hard part. But I continue to do it... day after day.
Once I've gotten all my clothes off, I stare at the scars that cover my body. There are the major ones that come from the straps that I'm fairly certain most soldiers get, considering I've had to clean up plenty of soldiers after outer wall excursions who've been bleeding and raw in the areas the straps go. My guess is that it come from overuse. Then there's the few I've gotten from fighting titans; causes ranging from being thrown off the smaller one's backs, miscalculating the size of the man-eating creatures and having one of the 3DMG steel tips rip out from their flesh then having me dangling from its back and hitting a few trees, and etcetera. I run my fingers over my slightly-crooked nose and sigh; I can still remember my nose being broken by those bullies as a child and I never could afford a doctor, so of course, I ended up having it grow that way.
The heat from the water scalds my skin when I step in the tub. But I do not cry out or tear up, truth be told, I kind of like the heat. It makes me feel warmer on the inside than I'll ever truly be.
I sit as I normally do in the tub: the complete opposite way you're supposed to. I rest my head against the side of the tub and stare up at the ceiling so I can think. That man really confuses me sometimes...
Why was he looking at me like that? I ask. Maybe he was just looking at something else.
I then start second-guessing my thoughts. Well... he looked at me for a long time... and it was a kind look.
Thinking like this hurts my brain a little bit so I've decided to drop the subject for now. I close my eyes and let the steam of the bath sweep me away into a sleep-like wonderland instead. It's much easier to not get myself stressed.