For The Love Of The Game

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Enter Player Name: Riley

The plain white door mocked me.

The whimsical Halloween sign, hung on the door for far too long, failed to draw the same amused chuckle it always did.

The keys jingled as Chris fumbled while opening the door. It ran against an empty symphony, lacking the rhythm of fun and inhibition that came with it. My heart bled in my chest, shredded by the night. It was easier to be numb and not feel at all.

After the last star in the sky had exploded, finally, Chris pushed the door open. With how bad he was at opening doors, it was a miracle he could find anything in the dark.

I didn't waste time and tackled him inside. He caught me in his arms and pressed his mouth against mine. I bit into his tight lips, edging him to do the same and draw anything from within me but this numbing pain. His eyes closed, and I thank the lord I didn't have to see those green eyes anymore. They were but a pale reminder of Noah.

My eyes stung when the image of Noah and his fiance appeared in my face. I kissed harder, hoping it would make the image fade. My heart twisted as it became more vivid.

I was at a loss. I shouldn't care this much. I thought my attraction to Noah was purely physical. How did I not see it? That he slowly chipped away at the brick wall I built to protect my heart.

To protect myself from this. From this unbearable heartache.

I should have known better. I knew better. Than to hope for good things.

Chris's hand grabbed the back of my neck as he kissed me. We stumbled, limbs tangled together, into his apartment. He kicked the door shut in the process. Chris' fingertips trailed down the slope of my back and grabbed my ass. At the same time, he mapped the length of my neck with his tongue. I closed my eyes, focusing on the shivering feeling aroused by his wet kisses.

Chris glanced up. I saw green eyes, and my skin turned ice cold.

Chris pulled away from my neck. "Is everything okay?" he asked.

I bit the inside of my cheek. Since when did he become my therapist? I held back the need to tell him to just get to what I came for and said, "Yeah, why?"

"Normally, you moan more when I kiss your neck?"

Normally my thoughts aren't filled with my neighbor, I thought. I cleared my throat and said, "I have a lot on my mind. Maybe a drink would help."

"You sure?"

"Yes. I want to forget tonight."

Chris raised his right eyebrow and walked into the kitchen. He returned with a bottle of whiskey and two shot glasses. "Does this have anything to do with the guy you were arguing with when I picked you up?" He asked as he poured the liquor up to the rim.

I gulped down my shot and wiped away the tiny stream that slipped out. The whiskey burned down my throat like drinking liquid fire. I savored the strong taste and how it overpowered everything else. "No, he is no-one," I said, not wanting to talk about Noah.

Christ took his shot. "I am not helping you cheat, am I?"

"No," I grunted. There should be an I don't want to chat button for hookups. I grabbed the bottle and took a massive gulp. I drank until the burning feeling became too much. I coughed as I caught my breath, feeling like a teenager having their first drink.

"Do you like him?" Chris asked. He leaned his head back and swallowed down his own shot. He held the glass for me to pour him another.

"Do you really want to talk about this?" I asked, entertaining myself with the wail of the bottle when the air I breathed brushed against the rim.

He straightened and focused his green gaze on me. Those green eyes. He said, "I have complained to you about girl problems in the past. It's only fair."

I chuckled, remembering the lunacy of how he would cry on my shoulder to only end up sucking my face the next minute. At least he got to the breakup. All I got was a stolen kiss, and the hottest moment I have had in a car — and all he did was speak. How pathetic.

"Well?" Christ asked again.

"I don't want to say it out loud."

"That bad?"

I sighed in defeat and mumbled, "I saw him kissing his ex. I never expected it would bother me so much like we aren't even together."

Chris' eyes softened. "You should tell him how you feel."

"There's no point." I looked away from his gaze. They were not the correct shade. "Things don't tend to work out for me. I mean, you are overall a nice guy, and I couldn't make things work with you."

"Well, I think to make things work, you actually have to try."

"Excuse me?" My neck cranked around to look at him and my eyebrows furrowed. "What's that supposed to mean?"

He edged away to the farthest corner of the couch, widening the distance before he spoke. "I don't think our relationship failed because you were too busy or because I partied too much. I think it failed because we just didn't care enough to try." He tapped his lip in thought. "At first sight of it becoming difficult, we were both happy to drop it."

I stared at him, stunned by his insight. My eyes began to sting.

"So, I guess what I am trying to say is," — he continued — "if you care enough about this guy. Just make sure you give it a decent try."

I bit my lip tightly and forced my emotion to remain locked tight in my throat. I did want to try with Noah. I had wanted to try with Noah, even if I never admitted it. But there was one lesson life had taught me so well. That life was full of disappointment.

I took one final drink of whiskey and said, "Like I said. It's not like it matters since he is back with his ex."

"So, I ask once more." Chris' words stretched out slowly in time. "Riley, are you sure you want to do this?"