Written last 29, December 2019
In this cold and deafening silent night, I found myself helplessly praying not for myself, but for you. In that moment, I have become hopeful.
I admit that I am fragile and I got hurt countless times. Still and all, I am certain that I've got stronger through time. I never shut my self from falling in love again but I kept it secured. I know that you will find your way leading to me. I became tired of searching for you so I just started praying for you. Every night, I consistently prayed that the next man that I will love would be the one God has sent me. And in the meantime, I focused on molding myself. I am working hard to be better than I was. I am trying to build my masterpiece, day by day. Each night, I always prayed to God to guide me to become the right person first before I meet you. And that when I finally meet you, I know for sure, that I'm ready because He knows best when I am. I'm certain that you would show me how mesmerizing it is to be loved for real. A love so raw and effortless. To be with you and feel so calm is what I desire. In your peace, I'd reside.
TO the man who will, I know all of those hardships in my past were meant to happen for us to cross our paths in the future. All of other men's rejections are just God's protection. Because in you, I'd feel how amazing real love is and that it is true. I could mess up but I will not be ashamed. I can be emotional but you won't see it as a weakness. I can laugh loudly but you won't deem it annoying. And I could fall, but you'd give me your support to help me get back on my feet. Because you know, you are my partner.
TO my future lover, I don't have any idea of who you are. But I have been praying for you since then. You could say I'm hopeless romantic. You may think of me as a woman who has always been so in love with the idea of love. Howbeit, all I hope for is your sincerity. And in the moment you shower me your genuine affection, I wouldn't think twice of giving myself a chance to love you. In a split second you unveil your pure intentions of solicitude, I would let my heart feel again. I tried to restrain myself from someone who gives me overwhelming attention for quite some time. I try to hold back and hide my emotions. Be that as it may, I believe it would turn out just fine with you. I'll have no fears of falling for you, because from the very beginning, you have assured me of your love.
To the man I'm praying for, I will never stop praying for you. I will never stop praying for my heart. It's funny to think that you will love me someday, but you don't have any idea of me today. And when our paths cross, in a month or two? in a year or two? By then, I would definitely be so happy to finally say, "This is what I was praying for".
