Shape Up

2

"Just... leave me alone!!"

Those words infuriated me. Was Oikawa really going to distance himself? Again?

I wanted to say something. I wanted to rush over to him and slap some sense into him. To scream and give him a scolding he wouldn't ever forget.

I'm the only one who stuck around... are you really gonna get rid of me too?!

It hurt. It felt like a stab in the back. So that's how much I mean to him.. nothing.

I stripped down and grabbed an outfit, knowing that Oikawa wasn't coming out of that blanket any time soon. And when I was done, I took my shoes and threw them on, stomping out of the dorm without another word.

Class was like every other day; long, boring, and surprisingly tiring. By the time my first class was over I could barely keep my eyes open. All because damn Oikawa kept me up half the night...

The second class was just as uneventful as the first. Same with the third, and the fourth. I couldn't stop thinking about Tooru, wondering if he was okay. He looked so distraught and I had just left him there...

Well, it was his fault for telling me to leave him alone. He'd better learn to be careful what he wishes for.

After what seemed like forever, my last class finally ended. Instantly, thoughts of Shittykawa were my main focus. What was that idiot doing now? For all I knew, he could be at another party by now...

I swear to god if he comes back drunk again I'll beat his ass.

I felt a sense of urgency as I was walking back to the dorm. For some reason I was... a little on edge. I couldn't help but worry about Oikawa... He can't take care of himself, so I have to clean up after his messes.

Metaphorically and literally.

Once I was finally at the dorm, a took a deep breath, preparing for whatever was waiting for me on the other side of the door. Half of me expected him to not even be home.

But when I opened the door, I immediately knew he was home. I found him lying in bed, fast asleep like nothing happened.

Wait a second. He's on my bed. Why?! First he soaked my shirt and now my pillow cases.

"You're just gonna lay there like nothing happened? And in my bed? You have your own god damn bed for a reason!" I walked over to him and poked him in the side, trying to see if he was actually asleep. I got no reaction, so he was definitely asleep. He wasn't even gonna apologize? I guess I really don't mean anything to him...

Oikawa's face was red and his cheeks were tear stained. His hair was all over the place, sticking out in places that were normally tame. It looked like he had been tugging at it.. trying to pull it right out..

Upon further inspection, I saw that he was wearing his favorite comfy shirt. It was an oversized scoop neck shirt with fleece on the inside that made it extremely soft. But the comfort wasn't the only thing Tooru liked about it. His favorite part was the giant alien head on the front. The rest of his appearance matched the pajama looking shirt; his disheveled hair, under eye bags, and a pair of boxers.

I've never seen him so... pathetic; vulnerable.

I wasn't there to help him... I'm normally always there to keep him in check... to put him in his place and make sure he was alright... But this time, I failed...

I wasn't there for him..

I stood there and watched for a moment. Hearing him snore and hearing his slow breaths. He looked lonely. He looked like an abused puppy.

I walked right back out of the dorm. I couldn't bear seeing him like this. I had to keep myself from screaming at him

So I walked to a near by bar and sat on one of the stools, figuring I was responsible enough to have a few drinks but not get wasted.

It had been so long since I let loose. I had been so uptight recently..

It's all because of what a pain in the ass Tooru is. If I don't hold him together nothing will. I'm the glue and he's the broken pieces.

One day will the pieces stop breaking?

I started with four rounds of shots, pacing myself and having water in between. Everything was going smoothly so far.

But after a while I ordered a few more rounds. Maybe.. six? Maybe a few more than that...

Well, there goes everything I said about being responsible. It was fine, though. It's not like this happens all the time.

That's when I decided I'd had enough. I stood up and stumbled my way out of the bar, using tables and such to help me balance.

When I got on the street, I put my hood up, walking clumsily and eventually heading back to the dorm. It was dark out now; about nine o'clock.

Once I was finally back home, I opened the door for the second time that day and saw Oikawa sitting on the floor, not crying anymore, but seemingly very upset.

"Hajime!! You're home... I- I was scared you weren't gonna come back.." He was awake now, and at first glance he couldn't tell I was drunk, but when he approached me, he made the realization.

"...shit.." He mumbled under his breath and slowly walked away. "We're gonna have a talk in the morning, okay..?"

I nodded in response and followed him, thinking it was a good idea to do so. I got really close and held onto his shoulders for stability.

"Why not talk now?" I was tempted to hug him and I didn't know why. I just... felt like it. I felt so weird around Tooru. So different.

"Because you're in no condition to be having any serious conversations right now... I didn't ever expect you to drink, Iwa-chan~" he giggled slightly, but it sounded fake. Forced. I couldn't do anything about it though...

My mind was too dull.

"You were being a stressful pain in the ass, so I needed something to keep my mind off it." Word vomit. I was just spewing out all my thoughts now.

"Did you succeed?" Oikawa asked with a slight chuckle, blushing slightly but still not pushing me away despite how close I was.

"...No... you're all I can ever think about..." I thought maybe I could move closer, so I did, leaning on Oikawa almost completely and keeping my arms on his shoulders. I have no idea why I wanted to be so close... it just felt.. right.

"Ah, Iwa-chan~ No one can stop thinking about me~ I'm irresistible~" he wrapped his arms around me, probably just to hold me up better, but it made my heart speed up and my eyes widen slightly.

I was so tempted to do so many things...

But... why?

A/N
Heyo!! Everyone stay safe and social distance!! Wear a mask!! A big thanks to Sophie and Astrid once again!!