Caroline Rose [discontinued]

4

There he is again.
Standing by my locker.
Brown hair falls past his ears.
Tiedye eyes scan the hall.

Thump. Thump. Thump my heart goes again.
One. Two. Three. Four.

"Hey." His voice sounds like a beautiful symphony. Musical notes swirl from his lips and into the air. They tie strings around my legs, pulling me closer and closer to him.

You're fat.
You're ugly.
You don't deserve to speak to him.

The demons talk; whispering in my ear.

Thump. Thump. Thump.
One, two, three, four.

He's judging you!
Look at his eyes!
He's staring at your gut!
At the fat dangling off your arms!

I look at his eyes as the demon says. They are beautiful. I follow his gaze. He's staring over my shoulder.

See?
You aren't worthy of his attention.
You're just an object in the way!

Thump. Thump. Thump.
One, two, three, four.

Blonde hair. A small frame.
Pink raspberry lips.
Vanilla like skin.

She wears a white floral dress.
And pretty blue heels.
Her heels match her eyes.

Her eyes are like staring into the ocean.
She looks past me and meets his gaze.
Shoulders relax.
A flawless smile eases onto her lips.

"I thought you weren't going to make it." She sighs.

My lock is cold on my fingertips. Everything is cold on my fingertips.

Thump. Thump.

"What did you want to talk about?" Blue-Green eyes look down on her. A note is crumpled in his pocket. He shifts from one foot to the other.

The girl.
She laughs.
It's soft like a cloud.
It's angelic like a piano.

"oh good. I did get the right locker. I wasn't too sure which one was yours. Luck must be on my side today."

See?
She's pretty.
And you aren't.

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I remind myself to breathe.
But they take shots at my heart.
Bullet after bullet.
Pain. Excruciating pain.

I hold my hand to my heart.
The demons they are right.
This only time they are right.

Thump. Thump. Thu-

"I'm sorry. I'm not interested."

The world stops spinning.
Time freezes in that moment.
His blue-green eyes are unapologetic.
The girl.
She took an arrow straight through the chest.
Tears.
She's fighting back tears.

I hide my face.
To hide my smile.

Triumphant.
Triumphant is exactly how I feel.