Dream Me a Sonatine

21 - We Become One Universe

The girl on the carousel tilted her head back in childlike wonder, feeling the sting of snowflakes on her cheeks. Fairground music sang in the air, lilting up and down like the painted horse she sat upon. She laughed and it was a sweet, young sound. She was a blank slate, ready to be drawn upon with the brightest colours—

Heejin clutched her head, groaning and leaning against the wall outside her hotel room. The pulling feeling had strengthened within the last few days and her feet rarely felt grounded to the earth anymore. Everything had already fallen apart, so why was she still unravelling?

She was a dream. The thought had come to her shortly after her epiphany about the Greywaren and she'd almost laughed, because of course she was. It was possible she'd known all along. How many times had she felt like a ghost in the vibrant streets of Paris? How many times had people almost noticed her and looked the other way, as if to unsee her wrongness.

But it didn't matter now. She was past the point of caring, because Chaewon was dead. If Heejin was only half-real, then Chaewon was barely an atom in the air. It hurt, god, it fucking hurt so much.

She stayed outside for a few more moments, and after her headache didn't fade, she sighed and unlocked the door. Hyunjin sat on the bed stroking Cyclops' head, immediately looking up upon Heejin's arrival.

'Hyejoo said she was tired of being licked for the night, so we're on dog-sitting duty.'

Heejin wrinkled her nose. 'He needs one hell of a shower first.'

'So do we,' said Hyunjin. Heejin, despite herself, gave her a teasing smirk.

'Well, we can't all fit in one shower.'

Hyunjin scoffed. 'You may be into some furry shit, but I'll pass.'

'Coming from you, cat-girl...'

'I am not getting in the shower with a dog.'

'But you'd get in with me?' asked Heejin innocently. Hyunjin threw a pillow at her, but not before Heejin caught the pink creeping up her cheeks. 'Fine, you take a shower. I'll get some snacks from the vending machine downstairs. At least, I think it's a vending machine, it was hard to tell through all the mould.'

'Get some bread,' called Hyunjin, shutting the door.

Heejin sighed on her way to the elevator, wondering what kind of vending machine Hyunjin thought sold bread. She pressed the ground floor button, cringing at the dried chewing gum plastered over the button's surface. Her headache had lessened slightly, no thanks to the pillow to the face.

The vending machine was a battered chunk of metal beneath several kilograms of cobwebs, mould, and various stains. Hoping she wouldn't contract some sort of disease, Heejin reached for keypad, then stopped as a sharp pain flared in her wrist.

Warily, she looked at her watch. An attachment from 'Adrien Couteaut' popped up on the screen, strangely ominous in its innocence. She tapped the file and an image filled the screen.

For a strained moment, she simply stared at the image. Then she tore the watch from her wrist and hurled it, shattering it to pieces on the floor.

The image was of Jiwoo's confectionary, or more accurately, what was left of it.

Heejin was trembling, the image of charred timber and melted glass seared into her brain. Everything Jiwoo had worked herself to the bone for was charcoal. All because she couldn't do her damn job and kill a Greywaren. All because Couteaut was an impatient bastard.

Underneath the image, it had read: Next time it'll be the shop's owner. Don't think I can't reach you in London. Hurry up.

Jiwoo, a bright ball of sunshine. Jiwoo, dead at Heejin's feet. Her head throbbed with anger, and that goddamn pulling feeling was back. Fairground music raced around her mind, taunting her.