Loving Eros

Chapter 9

Chapter 9

“I want you for worse or for better, I would wait for ever and ever. Broke your heart, I'll put it back together, I would wait for ever and ever.” -Taylor Swift

    ‘Journal Entry No. 1

    I guess this is how journals work, right? You’re supposed to write down your feelings and stuff. Well what about feelings makes them note-worthy? How can you tell if you’re acting on a feeling, a thought, or maybe just an action? Is there a difference?

    I guess I should probably mention my name, however, I feel that would be too dangerous. Let’s just say at my school, people aren’t very respectful of privacy. At all. My mission is to find out exactly what this concept of ‘love’ is. You see, my dad doesn’t firmly believe in it. He didn’t marry my mother. I used to live with her because dad was so often gone being in the military. He won’t tell me what love is like, not because he doesn’t know, I don’t think.

    As for me. I’m currently a freshman in high school, and I’m not very socially reserved. Basically, I’m the opposite of my dad, and they guy that I believe I’m in love with. I haven’t talked to him more than once, but there’s something about him, you know? He’s got gorgeously dark hair, and these rich green eyes that are simply dazzling. The one time we’ve spoken was when we were in the lunch hall. I was standing next to him in line and he asked if I wouldn’t mind taking his milk carton, he didn’t really want any. There was just something about that moment that made my heart speed up. Could love at first sight truly be a thing?’

    ‘Journal Entry No. 2

    The dreadful thing about when you love, or like someone, is when they’re in a relationship.

    I know, right? You’ve got to be kidding. I guess I’ll just have to make myself more appealing in some way to even get close to him. But wait, would that even be safe? I’m already shaking in my seat nervous just to approach him. Maybe I should think… His friends? Yes, that’s right! I’ll have to get close to his friends! I’m just not so sure he’s the type to have many. Is that a good thing, or a bad thing? I have one friend, I suppose. If you’d even call Amanda a friend. She’s super interesting, but she doesn’t go to my school, so I don’t see her all that often.

    The guy-- ‘PC’, I’ll call him, is a grade ahead of me. What terrifies me is that when I’m a junior, I still will not have gotten to know him, or have been with him, and he’ll graduate. That would just suck.

    For me, I suppose I should go by something, yes? How about Eros. Today we learned in my Comparative Religions class about the Greeks and their mythology. We’ll be studying this unit for two weeks. I always skip a few chapters ahead, so in the guide we were given, I stumbled upon the deity name of ‘Eros’, which is the greek god of love. Not to be confused with Aphrodite, oh heavens, no. She cheats on her husband with some hot warhead, apparently, and I don’t want to be associated with that. Ew, no.

Love, Eros.’

   

    Story set the journal down for a moment, furrowing her eyebrows. “‘PC’ and Eros, huh? Why, she sounds like just any other ordinary girl with a crush. A crush on…” And then the thought struck her.

    PC. Two letters. Two initials.

    Dark hair, green eyes.

    … No, it couldn’t be. Is it him? Did he see? Did he know? Did she know about the girl? He must have, who else could possibly own such a thing? It couldn’t be her, could it? Why would she keep something like this? Something to reveal her feelings? Now Story was beginning to have as many questions as Eros. Could Amanda also be who she thought it was? She had to find out now, so she skipped towards the end.