[ON HOLD] - Sweet Creature - [Outer Banks] - [JJ]

Casual Money Laundering

Song of the Chapter: Basin Street Blues by Louis Armstrong and His Hot Five

___

Remi laid in her bed, feeling as if her insides had become fermented from the alcohol. Exhaustion gripped onto her like a vice, not daring to let go until sleep fought it off. She laid there, her eyes shut and her lashes against her skin, lighter now that her mascara was washed off. Her hair smelled like coconuts from the shower she had just gotten out of, the girl had stripped out of her damp clothes as soon she had gotten home. One of her brother's old, large shirts draped her body as she tried her best to drift off to sleep.

Sleep didn't come, though, no matter how hard she tried.

She turned over, the old bed frame squeaking as she did so. She huffed, throwing her blanket off of her and begging sleep to overtake her. Still, she was awake. How could she be so drained and unable to fall asleep at the same time.

Her eyes scanned her room, covered in a shroud of darkness. The only source of light was the moon, the plug-in night light she had since she was a child not working due to the power still being out.

Not that she'd turn the light on yet anyway-- her head was killing her.

Her tired eyes landed on the small collection of jars on her shelf, full of shells and rocks she had picked up over the years-- a habit that she never grew out of, always stopping to pick one up from the ground every now and then.

It had always perplexed her how some of her favorite and most precious possessions were that of her mother's. The simple pearl necklace resting on her dresser had been her mother's, as well as most of the records that were stacked beside her record player. Even the surfboard that was propped against the wall in her small room had once belonged to the late Elizabeth Elliot. Though she and her mother's relationship was strained when the woman was alive, and even still, Remi held some buried resentment towards her mom, the two shared a few interests.

Remi just prayed that she wouldn't grow up and leave everything she loved for the first kook who said he loved her-- like her mother had. The woman had cut ties with all of her friends, even her own mother, Loretta, all for a world of yachts, luxury brands, the country club and overpriced salads. Even as a small child, Remi knew that Elizabeth and James Elliot were stuck in a loveless marriage-- it was one of the only things she was able to recall about her parents. It tore Remi up wondering if Elizabeth Elliot had just been misguided, sick of being dirt poor, or if she really was able to leave everyone behind with no regrets within her.

She knew the answers lied in her mother's diaries, given to Remi by her grandmother. After her mom passed, Loretta had passed down the journals, bot having read them herself and hoping it would provide the grieving young girl with some solace. Still today, they sit unopened in a box under her bed.

Remi squeezed her eyes shut, rubbing her fingers against her eyelids in an attempt to stop her mind from wandering.

Her mind usually wandered at night.

Night was when Remi was usually alone, not having her friends or her grandmother or anybody else to distract her from the few unpleasant memories that were embedded in her subconscious. She wouldn't say her general optimism was a facade, it was just easier. It was uncomfortable for her to work through the pain that was buried deep inside of her, so she just pushed it off until later-- hoping that 'later' never actually came around.

But at night, those foggy memories and feelings crawled back up to the surface like hundreds of bugs crawling out of the damp earth. From the darkest of crevices came memories of her mother and father. She beat herself up over holding grudges against them, given that they had passed. Hell, she didn't fully know why she held such strong disdain for her parents-- it wasn't like she could even remember much about them. But, they were her parents after all and she had never learned to balance the love that she would always have for them and the few memories of the pain that they had caused her while they were alive.