The Wonders Of You

1

ding.

I roll my eyes and grudgingly look away from what I'm watching to check who messaged me. I frown when I read the screen. Can he not take a hint? I don't want to talk to him. After all, he put us through? Hell no, we can't "talk." I take a swig of my juice, ignoring
the text from my dad. Sailor Moon is more important.

Right then my mom quietly knocks on my door. I sigh before answering. Can no one leave me in peace?

"Yes?" I ask, trying to hide my annoyance.

"Dinners ready, Mal Mal," she tells me from the other side.

"Okay, okay. I'll be down in a minute," I reply.

I finish the next episode before I finally go down to eat.

I trudge down the stairs dodging my two little brothers as they pass by squealing, toy lightsabers in hand. Who's that hyper on a Sunday night? Six-year-old boys, that's who.

"Hey, look who finally decided to come downstairs." My mom says this in a teasing tone, in an effort to cheer me up.

I give her a small smile for trying. She knows I've been having a hard time. We moved to Oregon almost a month ago during the summer.

_________

I was sitting in our backyard eating a Popsicle while my brothers played tag.

Suddenly I heard my mom yelling so I went to check it out. My brothers didn't notice so they continued playing.

I tiptoed closer to my mom and dad's voices. My dad sounded calmer than her. 

I peeked around the corner and noticed my mom's pale face was wet with tears, her expression was a mixture of rage and hurt. My dad looked nervous. He reaches for her hand but she jerks away and scoffs. 

"You sacrifice our marriage for this? Was this worth it?" my mom interrogates, her voice filled with emotion.

"It was a mistake. It won't happen again. I broke it off. I'm sorry Cherie..."

I shake my head in disbelief.

Did he cheat?

He wouldn't do this.

But he did.

I don't hear what my mom says after because I dash up to my room. I'm sure they heard my footsteps but I don't care. I bury my face into my pillow and sob. I sob until my face feels tingly and my body is weak.

_________

My mom has needed me to stay home and watch my brothers until we find a babysitter. She's an architect.Soon she will start taking work trips so she's trying to find a good babysitter before then. She's worried about us being unsupervised during longer trips. I tried convincing her that we'll be fine without a babysitter.

 I just turned 17, after all.

"You've been up in your room a lot more lately," my mom says while wiping off the table.

I nod. "Mhm."

"How are you doing?" my mom asks in a low voice as I take a seat at the table. I feel my chest tighten and I avert my eyes. I hate when people ask me this because I never have a clear answer.

".. uh I'm fine," I reply.

"Well, make sure you tell me if you ever want to talk about- you know..." Her voice trails off before finishing. I know exactly what she's talking about. The atmosphere becomes suffocating and I feel a wave of nausea come over me.

"It's still really hard for me to talk about this, sorry," I say.

"It's okay. I- I get it." my mom whispers.

"I have to... uh get ready for school tomorrow. Goodnight, mom."

"Goodnight, Mal Mal."

I feel bad but i'm not going to force myself to talk about it until i'm ready. 

Will I ever be ready?

I fall onto my bed and exhale. Dang, I should have brought that fried chicken up with me. I groan and reach for my phone. 2 missed calls from "idiot dad."

I stare at the screen and gulp. Am I being too hard on him? Maybe- I let out a frustrated sigh.

"No, I'm not. He deserves this." I say out loud. Part of me wants to forgive him, but then again all of me wishes he didn't ruin this family. All of me wishes my mom didn't have to raise my brothers and I, now, on her own. So the small part of me that wants to forgive him can choke.

I check the time, it's getting late. I better head in the shower.

I put the shower on super hot, as always. Anyone who chooses to shower in cold water is not to be trusted by me. I hum to Miley Cyrus's Midnight Sky as I wash, too shy to sing out loud.

When I'm done, I wipe the foggy mirror revealing my reflection staring back at me. I notice the dark circles under my eyes and my stressed expression that I probably wear 90% of the time. My thick black curls are drenched in water. I continue observing myself, critiquing. I wish I had clearer skin. Maybe some- hey don't do that! You're pretty as you are.

No, I'm not.

Well, your mom thinks you are.

So? She's my mom, of course, she does.

Okay, just shut up and go to bed.

I do need to get to bed and stop talking to myself. It's my first day at my new school tomorrow.

I spent the rest of the night dreaming of an alternate universe. One where my dad doesn't cheat on my mom and we're still a happy family.

Hi. This is my first story on Wattpad. if you have any tips for my writing or anything positive to say then it will be very much appreciated. Hope you enjoyed this chapter!

 -Gabbs <3