My lover suddenly and unexpected dropped dead at the worst time possible. I can't call her my girlfriend. At the time of her death she had a boyfriend who wasn't me. There's some people who think I know more than I claim. Some thought I was responsi...
A few days before Christmas I get a text. "No one's here, come over!" I said I couldn't that night but I was heading in her direction tomorrow night and if she would be around then. She would. I went to her place for the first time since our first date. When I got there things were not as I expected.
It seemed like she was drunk. But she wasn't. She was slurring words, dropping things, and looking like she was going to fall over any second. While I was there I was going to get some Xanax off her, but looking at her she might have eaten all of them.
"You ok? How many bars have you eaten?"
"Jus one."
Samantha was a tank. I'd seen this girl eat 180mg of Oxycodone, drink five beers, eat three Xanax 2mg bars and do all of the field sobriety tests at once perfectly so something was definitely up but there was no use grilling her. We hung out, smoked a joint, and she looked even more like she was about to fall over.
I have two regrets in life. Not giving my father the last hit of weed he requested before going into a surgery he wouldn't wake up from and the only time I said no to Samantha.
"Stay with me." She said. I wanted to. I really, really wanted to. But I had friends in Long Beach I had promised a four am ride to LAX. But the main reason was that she was officially still with him. Was she really planning on leaving him? I don't know for sure but in my heart I think she was. All her friends thought they were perfect for each other. Breaking up with him was going to be an unpopular decision. There was no way to do it without looking like a total asshole. Especially if she was leaving him for another guy. But there's a possibility she wasn't going to leave him. NONE of her friends knew about us or had even heard her mention me. NONE knew of the impending supposed break up.
"I really want to but I can't." And that sealed her fate. She pleaded with me but I pointed out that she was still living with her boyfriend. "*Sigh*. OK..."
"Oh, I have a little something for you." The last time I saw her she commented on my Djeep lighter. I had gotten her one in pink but couldn't find it so I gave her my white one.
"So you gave her a white lighter and then she dropped dead?" Asked Angie. A friend I was telling the story to a few months after the fact. Angie friend refused to use white lighters as there's a superstition for them being bad luck.
"Oh my GOOOOOOOOOOD!" I cried. My friend assured me the lighter didn't kill her and was sorry she mentioned it.
Two days later it was Christmas. Being Jewish it meant very little except a day off, light traffic, and Chinese take out for dinner. I woke up at 1pm. When I looked at my phone I paused for a moment.
22 missed calls. 18 new texts. Huh. Check the texts. "Call Shauna. You need to call Shauna as soon as you see this. Call me, please." I called Shauna. "Hi."
"Logan, I'm so sorry. But Samantha's gone." Gone? What do you mean gone? Where did she go? She's at her Dad's house right?
"No. She's dead." As Shauna told me what she knew I was in shock, disbelief, denial. This had to be a mistake. There would be no time to process.
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