You, Me, and All The Spaces In-between

CHAPTER 32

"Cash."

His name was barely more than a whisper on my lips, and I hastily cleared my throat.

"What are you doing here?"

"Can't I enter my own change room?" he asked, quirking a brow. "Coach sent me in here to get his clipboard."

He stepped closer, a challenge in his eyes. "What are you doing here?"

Oh god, my stomach was writhing and twisting with nerves. Why did he have such an effect on me?

"I-I was, um-doing an errand-a favour-for, um, for-"

"Take your time," Cash murmured, his voice a silken caress.

"Coach Meadows," I forced out, "asked me to put something away for her. And I did that. So, I'm just gonna go now..."

I started for the door, realised I didn't have my textbooks, then winced and turned back to collect them.

"You know," Cash drawled slowly, "you don't have to."

I met his gaze for the first time since he'd entered the room.

"You don't have to go," he clarified. There was a question in his voice. In his face. "If you don't want to."

What you want matters too, Alyx. Robert's words rang in my head.

"Is that what you want?" I asked finally.

Cash took another step closer. "I'm asking what you want. I want to know what you want, Alyx."

We were so close now, our breaths were almost intermingling.

I felt vaguely light-headed, a little dizzy. Being too close to Cash tended to elicit that reaction.

"I want..." The words melted on my tongue as our lips drew closer, almost touching. I could hear my heartbeat in my ears, feel the quickening of my pulse. "I want..."

I drew back at the last minute, taking a step away.

Cash's eyes fluttered open, regarding me in obvious surprise. He, too, looked slightly dazed, and it was baffling to me that I'd had that effect on him, that Cash could be that effected.

"I saw you with Casey in the hallway the other day," I said bluntly. Blankly. Like I was stating a fact, and nothing but a fact. Like it meant nothing to me. "You were kissing."

Genuine confusion seemed to cloud Cash's gaze-And then sharp realisation lit his features.

"Oh-Oh god, Alyx." He seemed sincerely upset, sincerely sorry. His voice hitched slightly as he continued. "Alyx, she kissed me. It was so sudden, and so quick-I pushed her off right away. I swear."

I averted my gaze, because that was easier than looking into his face. I wanted to believe him. So, so badly. And I hadn't exactly stuck around to watch-I'd turned away the second Casey had touched her lips to his.

Had he really pushed her away?

"Alyx, I swear it's the truth." He reached for my hand, dropped his own hand to his side, then reached again, slowly, giving me the chance to refuse his touch.

I didn't.

"Alyx, I wouldn't do that you," Cash insisted, grasping my hand.

God, he sounded so sincere.

"I would never do that to you," he continued softly. "I would never run off and kiss someone a literal hour after our argument. You're worth so much more to me than that."

I finally brought my eyes back to his, silently studying their blue depths. Trying to find the answer to some unknown question.

"Really?" I asked. It came out so soft. So gentle.

"Really." I'd never heard his voice so tender; I felt as though I could melt.

I was silent for a moment, parting my lips, trying to find the words. "I need..." It was so hard to say. Why was it so hard to say? "I need to know what we are."

I stared at Cash and he stared back, seeming to search my gaze in the same way I was searching his.

"I need," I continued hesitantly, "to know where we really stand-Where I stand with you. You don't," I added quickly, with sudden intensity, "you don't need to come out. To anyone. I would never do that to you. I would never try and make you do that. That's for you, and no one else, to decide on."

Cash was still staring at me, wordless, expression completely unreadable.

"I just need to know what's going on here," I finished finally. "If...If anything is."

A question. And a line in the sand. I waited in baited silence for that moment of truth.

And then Cash put his hand on my cheek, gently caressing with the pad of his thumb. There was wonder in his eyes, and something else. Something vulnerable.

"You're incredible." It was a whisper. Nothing more, nothing less. "I don't-I don't understand, how you can be so wonderful despite-"

He broke off suddenly, eyes flicking away, then moving back to my face.

"Alyx, I want you. So much. I want you with me. As much as possible, for as long as you'll allow." He rested his forehead against mine, and I closed my eyes, letting the euphoria of the moment wash over me. "I'm yours, Alyx. I'm yours."

In a sudden movement, I grasped Cash's shirt in my hands and tugged his lips to mine.

He responded immediately in kind, fingers threading into my hair, mouth moving hungrily against mine. We moved quickly, frantically, like we were running out of time, like the world was crumbling around us and we only had these few moments left-

The door handle rattled behind us.

We sprang apart as Coach Westley stuck his head into the change room, thick brows furrowed in confusion. "Smith? There you are."

He strode into the middle of the room, letting the door swing shut behind him.

"I thought you'd gotten lost," he muttered, snatching a clipboard from the bench. "Honestly, where'd you go. Narnia?" He chortled suddenly, laughing obnoxiously at his own joke.

"Now," he added, turning to me with a quizzical expression, "who are you?"

"I was just leaving, sir," I said quickly, gathering my textbooks in my arms.

"Hmm. Okay." Coach Westley fixed Cash with a stern frown. "You get back to practice, alright?"

We watched in silence as he sauntered from the room.

Then Cash released a loud sigh and began to laugh, running a hand through his hair. "Jesus. That was close."

"Can't believe you were away from practice for so long," I teased, shaking my head in mock disbelief. "Honestly, it's not good enough, Smith."

"Me?" Cash poked me lightly on the shoulder. "I can't believe goody-goody Miller was away from class for so long."

"Right," I snorted. "Forgive me. I'll let you get back to the Geckoes."

He scoffed. "Are you implying there isn't something inherently masculine about my football team?"

"You do realise," I shot back, "that you guys run around with green lizards on your jerseys?"

"Mmm." Cash pressed a kiss to my forehead, then made for the door. "Catch you later, Miller."

I stood in dazed silence as the door shut behind him, holding a hand to the place he'd just kissed. My cheeks were red. My heart was racing. I felt faint again.

Oh my god. Cash wants me.

Me.

I shook my head, stumbling absentmindedly from the change room.

That boy is going to be the death of me.

A/N: Thankyou so much for reading!