PERFECT | 𝘯. 𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘢𝘯 ✔

Chapter 22: Everywhere.

[Try and try to erase you,
but you won't disappear ]

---

Niall's Pov:

      It's been a week. A week since she was stolen from me. Even though we never dated, it hurt just as much. Like a dagger at the heart. I knew I should've made my move sooner. But, even if I did, I don't think it would've made a difference. But if it did, maybe then she would've been mine. Not his.

      I was able to talk my way out of partying again. Instead, I pulled up my hoodie and went out to walk around Belgium. To clear my head. As I walked out of my room, I pass Emily's room. Through the single piece of wood blocking me and her, I can hear her giggling and laughing as his voice follows. Damn that Jessie guy. Every time she smiles -that's not from us- my heart shatters a little more. 

      I've made it out of the hotel successfully without getting noticed. I walked out of the lobby and started walking down the sidewalk and left my head hung low. Pedestrians gave weird glances at me for having a hood up when it wasn't even raining. Cold, to add to that. 

      Why can't I be happy for her? She seems like she's happy at the moment. Why can't I just accept that? Maybe it's because I'm now just realizing that I've been extremely selfish about this entire damn situation. I only wanted to touch her. I only wanted her. I wanted her to myself. How could I have been that stupid to put my feelings before her? If I truly cared about her, then I would respect that she didn't want to be with me. But no, I only tried to get her away from everyone else. God, I'm such an asshole. 

      But I keep getting flashbacks from that night. Our night. The night where we were a drunk mess and slept together. I know I shouldn't, but I can't help it. They just randomly appear in the worst of times. I have to erase it. I have to leave it in the past and move on. Why couldn't I move on? That's an answer that I couldn't find even if I asked the smartest person on this entire planet. But she's taken up most of my brain. 

      Her smile... So happy and cheerful. Her hair... So soft and smells like strawberries. Her eyes... So brown like a pool of chocolate and you can get lost in them so easily. She's so kind and caring. She's always putting others before her. She's goofy and talented. She's just... Perfect.

      Dammit, Niall! Just let her go!

      Not many people are out at this hour. And it was so dark, the only lights came from the shops and cars. It was quite peaceful. But I spoke too soon. "Oh my god. It's Niall Horan!" A girl's voice and many others followed and before I could even blink, a mob of teenage girls surrounded me and flashing lights blinded me. Each person yelling my name, desperate for my attention. 

      Of course I love my fans. They're the ones who got me to where I am now. So, I plastered a fake smile and took a photo with some of them. I screwed my eyes shut and rubbed them after a blinding flash went off. I opened them again and, I don't know if it was real or not, but I saw her. There. Standing in the mob of fans. I blinked a couple times a rub my eyes before opening them again. I was right. She wasn't there. 

      "Niall? Are you okay?" I look to the girl who's handing her friend her phone. 

      I nod with a fake smile, "Of course, petal." 

      "Are you sure?" 

      I nod, "Positive." I hate lying to them. I really wish I could come to them and tell them about my problems. They're like my best friends. But it's not for them to worry about. 

      God, why am I seeing Emily everywhere? It's like I can't stop seeing her. Why am I still even thinking about her? Every time that I'm even in the same goddamn room with her, it feels like the world locked us on some stranded island without a way out. I swear that every time I turned a corner to the place where I'm at now, she was just standing there. Waiting for me. And it's hard to think or even breathe when I hallucinate that she's there.

      She has this huge effect on me. Every time I'm near her, I can feel my stomach do somersaults and my heart quickens a million times faster. And it's like I can't even talk around her anymore. Why is it so hard to even stand in the same room as her?

      Why is it so goddamn hard to admit to myself that I'm in love with the photographer?

------

[ Everywhere - Niall Horan ]

------

A/N:

SURPRISEEEEE!!!!

I have a question.

Was it too early for Niall to admit his feelings to himself?

I don't think it was, but this book is for you, so your opinion is much needed. 

Vote, Comment, Share

TPWK.

All the love, C. xx