Silence is Safer

Silence is Safer ch.3

Silence is Safer Chapter 3

Adrenaline pumping through his veins, as his heart pounds against his chest, the Italian say there, frozen. He wanted to push the hand away, to move. However, memories of what happened when he tried to defend himself before came to mind and kept him in his place. The voice that followed from the touch made him relax, if only just a little bit.

"Feliciano...? What are you doing here?" Ludwig whispers slowly to him. That question... He was expecting it, but how was he suppose to answer? He only knew ASL for school, and he doubted the German knew much if any. The little Italian bites his bottom lip a little, nervously, before he looks over at the other teenager. He tilts his head back some and runs his hand down his throat, his fingertips brushing down the skin. It was the universal sign for "mute" so the German should know at least what that meant. Thankfully, he was right, as understanding seemed to fill the blond's eyes, but was then mixed with concern and confusion. It was clear that Ludwig was thinking, which was a bit confusing, and he wanted to know what he was thinking. Before Feliciano could get a chance to even tilt his head to show he was curious and unsure, he saw his once boyfriend go through his book bag. That really didn't do anything to clear this up. What was his idea?

Next thing he knew, the blond pulled out a notebook. Now things were starting to make sense. Especially after he saw him start writing inside of it. /He's going to write in the notebook to talk to me.../ he thought. That idea was confirmed when that same notebook was placed onto his desk. Curious, the Italian looks over what was written.

"Why did you become mute? What happened?" The words read. He knew these questions were coming. But so early? He didn't even know what to consider his once best friend and boyfriend. We're they still together? We're they even friends? 'You are most certainly /not/ together. It is a sin.' That voice was preaching to him once more. He was getting tired of this battle. It was times like these where he just wanted to give into the voice just to make it stop. He realized he had been staring at the page far too long without actually answering the questions. The copper haired one pulls out his pencil and writes down his answer.

"Things happened," he wrote before handing their object of communication back to Ludwig. He didn't seem all that thrilled by the answer he had received. But he also knew that the blond was patient and kind when it came to "his little Feli". It was so nice to think of that... 'No. You are /not/ "his little Feli". You should be ashamed for thinking of going back to your past!' The voice went on.

/Leave me alone! Please just stop torturing me! I just want to be able to have my best friend back!/ he argued with that forced on mindset.

While he had that little argument in his head, Ludwig placed the notebook back onto his desk. Feliciano blinks and looks down at it.

"I understand that things happened. But WHAT happened?" The question read. The Italian hesitated slightly in answering this. However, it was soon quickly passed back with a little response.

"I can't explain," he had written to the German. The blond gives the smaller male a questioning look, clearly trying to figure out what this meant. He began to reply and soon had it back on the mute teen's desk once more.

"You can't explain it, or you don't want to explain it?" The response read. Feliciano only had one word to answer to that question.

"Both."