ink • soonhoon (completed)

• seventeen •

jihoon laid in the back yard with his eyes shut as the small blades of grass tickled his face and the sun kept his body warm but the breeze kept him from sweating. for once in his life he felt at peace, everything felt okay for once. his chest rose and fell as he absorbed the atmosphere. soonyoung watched from a window as he admired the boy. small strands of hair and his shirt blew in the breeze, he looked relaxed.

soonyoung wasn't sure what lead to jihoon laying in the grass but he didn't dare interrupt the boy. soonyoung was happy watching him. as soonyoung watched he heard a faint knock on the door. he looked to the jihoon and grinned once more before walking towards the front door. soonyoung peeped through the peephole, checking to see who it was before opening the door, and grinned as he saw wonwoo. soonyoung unlocked and opened the door and wonwoo smiled as he waved.

"where's jihoon?" wonwoo asked as he walked into the house and kicked off his shoes.

"laying in the grass in the backyard," soonyoung said as he shut and locked the front door behind wonwoo. wonwoo grinned.

"he's really gotten so much better with you," wonwoo thought aloud as he plopped onto the couch.

"he used to be cold and would barely talk. the first time i saw him even crack a grin was when he talked to you," wonwoo said as he lightly chuckled.

"when he showed you his tattoos i was so shocked.. he's never even shown me all of them. i only spot the ones on his arms when he works with his sleeves up.. you've got something special with him kid," wonwoo continued and soonyoung lightly bit on the inside of his lower lip. he didn't know what to say.

"yeah, i guess so. i just.. i really love him," soonyoung said as he plopped onto the recliner that sat adjacent to wonwoo's spot on the couch.

"glad to hear because if you hurt him i will break your kneecaps and cut your fingers off.. one.. by.. one.." wonwoo threatened as his face twisted from the usual warm expression to an absolutely petrifying one. soonyoung gulped and nodded.

the back door clicked as jihoon stepped back inside. he looked around quickly for soonyoung but frowned upon not spotting the boy, he would usually come and greet jihoon when he came back inside. jihoon walked to the living room and the corners of his mouth turned up a bit as he saw wonwoo.

"hey woo," jihoon said as he walked to soonyoung on the recliner. wonwoo smiled and waved.

"since the lovebirds are gathered now i'll tell you the reason for my visit.." wonwoo replied with a slightly ominous tone as he looked to the two. jihoon was now sitting on the arm rest of the recliner while his legs rested on top of soonyoung's and soonyoung's arm was snaked around jihoon's waist.

"we're going apartment shopping! we don't want you two returning to your old apartments in case someone tries to pull something so mingyu sent me to help you two with shopping! mingyu and i are gonna pay for it so don't even think about price! just find one that fits you two." wonwoo chimed as his tone shifted from ominous to cheery.

jihoon's eyes slightly widened as he realized he would be living with soonyoung. of course he wanted to wake up and spend his mornings with his lover but the sudden fear of soonyoung getting tired of him then discarding him hit jihoon harder than a truck. while soonyoung smiled and loved the idea he glanced over to jihoon but was taken aback by his expression.

"i h-have to pee. i'll be r-right back," jihoon stuttered as he began to feel nauseous, his anxiety was messing with him again. soonyoung released his waist and jihoon hurried for the bathroom. did jihoon not want to live with him?

"he's probably nauseous. he tries to play it off but he's terrified of losing you or you getting rid of him.. i can read him like a book," wonwoo sighed and soonyoung's eyes widened. soonyoung stood up abruptly and walked towards the bathroom.

jihoon sat on the floor as he trembled. he couldn't breathe, it felt like someone was pressing on his chest and crushing his lungs. why couldn't he calm down? he just wanted to calm down. jihoon's eyes stung as tears began to fall, he had been fine for so long why was it back? no matter how much he told himself that soonyoung wasn't going to leave it wasn't working. jihoon's jaw hung open as tears fell but not a single sob could come out. he felt like he was suffocating. jihoon just wanted it to stop.

there was a faint knock and jihoon looked to the door but ignored the knock. soonyoung knocked again but once again there was no response. he reached for the doorknob and was surprised when it twisted fully and the door opened. jihoon looked over terrified as tears streamed down his face and he clutched his chest.

soonyoung opened the door and spotted jihoon. he felt his heart shatter as he looked to the trembling sobbing boy. soonyoung shut the door behind him and he fell to his knees beside jihoon. soonyoung pulled him to his chest even as jihoon tried to push him away, he would never let him go.

"i love you jihoon," soonyoung said as he clenched onto the trembling boy. jihoon's fists pushed into soonyoung's chest as he tried to get out of his grasp.

"g-get off of m-me," jihoon demanded as he struggled and soonyoung kept him in his arms.

"never. i finally have you i'm never letting you go," soonyoung replied and jihoon's resistance slowed for a second but picked up rather quickly.

"l-let me go!" jihoon shouted but soonyoung didn't let him go. jihoon honestly wanted to collapse into his arms but he was terrified.

"no, i'm never letting go and never leaving," soonyoung said back and jihoon's resistance subsided completely.

"e-even when i p-push you away?" jihoon asked and soonyoung gripped onto him tightly.

"even when you push me away. i'll never leave my jihoon," soonyoung answered and jihoon clenched onto soonyoung's shirt as his tears left wet spots.

soonyoung would hold jihoon through every panic attack and he'd never let go. he'd hold him through the bad and the good. when he held jihoon in his arms he felt as if he was holding the whole world, soonyoung felt infinite as long as he had him in his arms. wonwoo sighed as he looked to the ceiling, it seemed as if he wasn't needed anymore. jihoon was taken care of now.

"we can go apartment shopping some other day,"

• author's notes •

sorry for the update so late at night fjdjdj i started writing this chap earlier and was like 500 words in then my wattpad glitched and only had one sentence but ngl I like this version more anyway dndjdn

i hope you enjoyed, thank you for reading <3

-lilly