Depression and Feelings

Part 2

I can hear everyone playing downstairs, pillow fights and scary movies playing. No I wasn't invited ofc, I don't want to interrupt their fun so I'll just sit in my room like I did all day. With a hoodie over my head and watching the rain outside. I haven't left my room for 3 days straight, no food, no water, I've showered but my bathroom is in my room so I'm pretty sure I was set. I didn't want to gain weight since my sisters told me I've been getting fatter. Their Instagram models so ofc I'm gonna listen, he's tiktok famous what else? Kairi came over tonight and he seemed down getting out of his car as I looked out the window. My mom has been in Florida for 3 months and my father has been dead for my entire life or that's what my sisters tell me. Idk anything because my mom never tells me anything. I don't feel like leaving my room for the rest of spring break. I have slits on my wrist old and new from today, what do you think I'm doing as I'm watching the rain? Yes cutting myself. It's not like anyone cares anyways...

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I hear my door handle shake and I've had it locked. Someone knocks and I say "Who is it?", "Mattia" I put my blade in my drawer and roll my sleeves down.  I get up and unlock the door, he opens it and he had chickfala and gifts in his hand. I smile a little bit but stop, I walk back to my bed and I can feel his smile go away.  I sit down and Mattia sits next to me "Ally can we talk?" I shrug my shoulders.

Mattia~What's been going on?"
Me~.........
Mattia~Ally answer me"
Me~.........
Mattia~You know you can tell me right?"
Me~.........
Mattia~Ik your mad at me and it's okay I understand-"
Me~I'm not mad at you tia" I say quietly.
Mattia~You don't have to lie to me Ally, I completely shut you out of my life. The girl I knew the longest before everyone else, I let fame take me to a different stage in myself and I left you and I'm sorry. I haven't been happy since you've been out of my life and I never meant to judge you about what you wore. I just didn't want a guy to-" I cut him off and say "Just get out Mattia" he looks at me and says "Ally please" I shake my head and he gets up and walks out.