-A Little Help- (KuroKen)

13

(Kuroos POV)

The walk back to my house was quiet and calm, even though I enjoyed hearing Kenma's voice I knew talking would only strain him. So when he fell asleep on my back, with his head buried into my neck, I felt relieved. Everything was calm and happy despite what had just happened. I still can't wrap my head around the situation. I never had any problems with Takao, Suzuki, or Ito before and even though I knew someone on the team was giving Kenma a hard time I never imagined it would be them, especially not to that extent. I didn't know them well and they kinda stuck to their own group, I just assumed they were shy. 

I knew something was up since Kenma always seemed to fear volleyball practice even when he got comfortable around most of the guys. This was my fault, I should have figured out what was happening sooner. Now he's so shaken up he can barely speak let alone walk. Not to mention his eye's pretty much swollen shut and bleeding, all because I didn't pay attention. All because I didn't stay with him like I promised. But what happened happened and I can't dread on the unchangeable past. I need to focus on the right now and help Kenma. My mom wouldn't have an issue with him staying the night, since he did so many times, and since it was Friday school wouldn't be a problem either. However, how would I explain his eye?

Eventually the long walk home had ended and to my luck my parents were out having a date night. I was able to lie Kenma down on my bed without waking him. I'd have to nurse him back to health to make up for leaving him to get beat up in the first place. He looked so peaceful lying on my bed. Gently, I put my hand up to his forehead, it's hot. He probably has a fever. With that in mind, I went downstairs to grab a water, an ice pack, a wet rag, and some pain killers. He'll probably want them when he wakes up. When I returned to my room I gently placed the damp cloth over his forehead and the ice pack on his eye. He began to squirm slightly in his sleep, is he having a nightmare? With the day we've had I wouldn't be surprised. He's shaking, what do I do? I grabbed his trembling hand in my own while leaving my other hand to hold down the ice pack.

"Hey Kenma," I squeezed his hand slightly. "Relax it's ok." My words seemed to calm the small boy down easily as his shaking stopped, I didn't remove my hand though. I didn't really want to, I was in no rush to let him go. Turning towards the digital clock on my desk I noted the time, ten pm. I moved the ice pack onto my night stand and removed the damp towel to soak it again. I wonder if he's calm right now? I tried to study his face but he only looked tired, even though he was asleep right now. I wonder what his heart was saying? Did Kenma's heart flip the same way mine did? Did he feel nervous holding hands on the way to school, did he get happy when we ate lunch together, did he enjoy spending extra time with me like I did with him? How would I know? 

Slowly I found myself leaning down resting my head on his chest. His breathing was calm. I could stay like this forever, just listening to his heart beat. It's calm even though just moments ago a nightmare was causing his breathing to be erratic. I lifted my head again and stared at the sleeping boy, he's so cute, precious. Again I leaned down, but this time I pressed a gentle kiss on his forehead, he was still hot. I rang out the cloth and placed it back on his head, over the spot I had previously kissed before laying in the bed next to him. Our extra futon was still in the wash and I didn't really want to let go of Kenma's hand. I never want to let go of Kenma again. Kenma... I think... I think I love you.

(Kenmas POV)

"You're weak. You're pathetic. You're a nobody."

"Isn't that right Kozume-kun?"

"No one could love a sad little Koneko like you, Kozume-kun. Didn't we tell you this?" I stared down the three third years in front of me in pure terror, where's Kuroo? I need him. "Didn't we all tell you this?" Suddenly I was surrounded, not just by the Nekoma third years but by all the kids who had ever tormented me since elementary school. Faces I thought I would never see again, voices I didn't want to hear again.

"Aren't you a little small for a boy, Kozume-kun?"

"Why are you shaking, are you really that scared? Ha! Pathetic!"

"You can't make friends when you act like that, Ken-chan." I can't handle the taunts. They were right weren't they? I am so small, I'm weak. I shake in fear and take out the pain on myself, that's pathetic, how could I? I'm nobody, I'm not important, no one could love someone like me. No one could love someone like me, no one could love someone like me, no one could love someone like me, no one could-

"Hey Kenma," The soft, familiar voice seemed to pierce my thoughts and the voices. "Relax it's ok." Suddenly everything was quiet, I felt warmth rush through my body. Where did everyone go? The voices had stopped and so did the panicked thoughts?

I opened my eyes quickly but gently, trying to scan my surroundings. What happened? Where was I? I sat up slowly but found myself being held back by something. I turned to see what was the cause of my restriction only to find a sleeping Kuroo holding my hand. Oh right, I sleepover Kuroo's after- pain shot through my eye as if it was on cue. Right. After the incident at practice. Looking to my right I saw a glass of water on the nightstand, I reached over with my freehand and took a long sip. It felt nice running down my throat. The clock on the desk told me it was 2:37 am, when did I fall asleep? 

I debated getting up, running home in shame, but I didn't want to leave Kuroo not after everything he'd done. I don't want to leave Kuroo every. I don't want him to leave me either. The warmth of his hand holding mine, now and on our walks to and from school, his soft voice speaking to me about random topics, his hands rubbing my back as I found it hard to hold onto myself and reality. What is this feeling? I want Kuroo to stay by my side, is that selfish of me? Is it wrong to think this way? What would Kuroo think if he found out my thoughts one day? He said himself that he didn't want to be alone, he said he needed me. What did he mean by that? I was snapped from my thoughts when the hand on mine began to move slightly.

"Kenma?" I looked to the sleepy boy next to me who was rubbing his eye. I looked down at our hands still intertwined, he followed my gaze. "Ah sorry!" Quickly he removed the warmth from my hand. I didn't really want him to do that. "Here take this." He reached over me and grabbed two pills laying on the nightstand. "I brought you up a water too, it will help with the pain." I plopped one of the pills in my mouth before taking a sip of water, feeling it glide down my throat. I repeated the process with the other pill. "We didn't have another futon... so I just layed in the bed. Sorry. I... I don't want to make you uncomfortable or anything. I can sleep on the couch if you wa-"

"Stay." I cut him off. It was only one word, sure but it felt powerful. It felt like everything I was feeling inside was bubbling over and coming out with that one word. Should I expand on it? Was this enough for him to understand? Did he understand? Could he tell me what I was feeling? He laid back down and I followed our backs facing each other. "Kuroo?" I whispered slightly turning to face his back, he must have felt me move and did the same. Our faces were inches apart down and I could feel his breath. "Can you..." How do I say this? Am I allowed to ask this of him? Was this weird, was this too much, would he say no? "Can you hold my hand?" The words came fumbling out of my mouth even though I didn't even want them to come out. I can't think properly when I'm around Kuroo. My heart beats nervously, my mind races, words just come out. I would say the symptoms are similar to my anxiety attacks, however, when I feel this way around Kuroo it makes me happy. Is that normal? Am I allowed to be happy? Am I allowed to be this happy with Kuroo?

"Of course." He gripped my hand and the warmth immediately made me tired, I closed my eyes slowly allowing a small smile to rest on my face. These were becoming more common, but only with Kuroo. Soon enough my breathing slowed and my mind began to slip into a blissful dream. However, not before I could hear Kuroo say, "Kenma." I wanted to open my eyes to see him, to speak to him, but I couldn't will myself to do it. He sighed, "Goodnight." I felt his grip tighten, it was comforting. "I love you, Kenma."
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We love fluff chapter :)) Just a heads up the next chapters prob gonna be a little shorter so I might post two but idk having a bit of writers block