ONCE (JoongNine AU)

Chapter 6

5 years ago, The End of Year

Nine

My eyes were liked two globes, I kept crying during the fan meeting. I felt a burden so huge inside my heart, that couldn't be voiced out to anyone. We sing together, dance together, hold hands and hugs, but the physical closeness didn't lessen the inner distant that engulfed me, even when he was just standing next to me on the stage. This had been going on for months, and today was the closure of everything related to the series, the finale fan meeting. After this, we would no longer tied up as a partner, both would venture into other projects and maybe a meet up once in a while for a meeting at the company.

When the curtain finally falls, that we no longer had to smile to the audience, just as soon, he let go of my hand and moved to the dressing room. I followed as fast as I could, lest I would lose him between the other actors, crews and dancers. The dressing room was empty, most of the staffs still enjoying the surrealness of such huge fan meeting, and took as many photos as they could in the surrounding lobby area where fans had set up various banners, flowers and lightboards.

He realized that I had entered, but still not looking, and kept arranging things that he would bring home. The large gifts and plushies would be brought to the company later by the company van, too many and mixed up for all the actors.

"Joong, you won't join the after party with us?", I asked just to strike a conversation.

"Nope. Can't. Underage", he said curtly without even looking at me. I felt embarrassed, yes, his age in the series do permit him to be in the club, but in actuality, he couldn't. It seemed liked his coldness was detrimental to my sanity. My messed-up mind and feeling seemed to mix the two worlds, unconsciously.

"Then, would you like me to send you home? I could skip the after party. I came with my car here, so we could go back as soon as you like, it's already almost midnight anyway", I was jumpy, rushing for something that I didn't know. I prayed that the others were still far, that I could somehow persuade him to relent.

He raised his head that had been looking at everything other than me for the past 5 minutes, and looked questioningly, as if my request was too foreign and weird. Before he could give any answer, the door to the room opened, and flight of people came in, with Pavel being the loudest.

"Nine, Joong, my lovelies, I was searching for both of you. We all took group photos, yet nobody knew where you had gone", Pavel knew a bit of our situation. He was quite close to both Joong and me. I just smiled awkwardly, signaling to Pavel to help me out of the situation. Pavel understood immediately and playfully go and punch Joong, "Eyyy, this baby. Why did you walk away too early from the stage? Nine, of course would follow you anywhere". Joong just smiled too and shook his head. He continued to arrange his things, and said, "Sorry na P'. I need to fetch a taxi home, so couldn't delay too much, lest I will arrive home in early morning. All of you will go to the party, so I don't want to bother anyone to do that for me".

"Really? But, Nine said to me before the event started that he won't join, because you both will go back together. Your aunt house is on the way to his dorm, right?", Pavel said that loud enough for everyone to hear, while looking devilishly at me. Joong looked surprised and almost opened his mouth to answer, but I immediately blocked his chance, "Yes, I told Pavel, but just only now asked Joong. So, Joong, let's go back together, na?", I said and boldly hold his arm tight, pleading him not to say anything contradicting. Joong didn't say a word, and I simply deduced it was a yes, although a pressured one.

Joong

Nine kept crying; during a sad duet; during the farewell speech; every time he looked directly at me, his eyes were shiningly wet. Though my heart felt heavy, I didn't think it was related to me. He had always been easily touched by emotion; a crybaby; but never this much. Maybe, it was just that this event was overall, a farewell; to a successful journey and a brighter start to all the actors involved; when the start had been rough, yet the ending was sickly sweet. Except to both of us, who had tasted something sour, nearing this end.