I gave the best of myself to someone who didn't have anything to lose. I didn't know how to avoid my lover's toxic and abusive flames. My lover's twisted words were like a maze inside of my head that I couldn't escape. Sadly, my lover's actions hypn...
Love isn't leaning in for a kiss, yet a fist meets you halfway. Love isn't being a boxing bag because someone decided they wanted to beat on you today. Love isn't saying I love you just because someone wants to keep you to themselves. Love is not a curse filled with darkness and led by fear. Love is not being afraid to walk into the unknown, not knowing if you will be alive the next day. Love isn't being told you are not worth living, or you are not loved. Love isn't a manipulator who grins as it thinks it has power over your thoughts and your life. Love is not losing yourself in the process as you look at yourself in the mirror, and you cannot recognize who you are. Love isn't the bruises on your face or the scars on your back that you try to cover up. Love doesn't steal your joy or your soul to get the satisfaction of seeing you vulnerable. Love doesn't expose your weakness for everyone to see.
Love is tender, kind, forgiving, and unconditional. When you were born, you were loved by so many people. Favored in ways that you never imagined. You never wanted for anything. Love was surrounding you, just like the sunbeam on the flowers that gives them the energy to grow. Yes, you had some showers, but that doesn't mean that you weren't loved—those were the times the showers were teaching you how to stand and make decisions on your own. The problems occurred when you surrounded yourself with the wrong crowd. As the saying goes, you are who you associate with.
You have lost control. Suffocating and drowning. Asking yourself, what did I do to deserve this?
Sadly, you are getting nothing in return, yet, you keep going right back to the person who you need to walk away from. Wake up from this nightmare! There's no need to be afraid; you are brave enough to find the strength to carry this load. Do not make a choice to suffer when life is meant to be live and to be enjoyed. Find the courage to know your worth and know that you deserve better than the distasteful lies that are whispered in your ears. You have the strength to fight your insecurities. Do not be afraid to take the leap of faith. When you find the courage to jump, you will jump into a safety net in the arms of people who love you and who are willing to help you fight the never-ending battles.
You are not alone. Do not let the thoughts of others paralyze your train of thinking. Continue to keep one foot in front of the other. Do not look back; each step counts when you keep moving forward. There's no need to second guess whether you should stay or leave because the past will trip you up. It will send you back to an uncontrollable storm that may very well cost you your life. Keep in mind, you are loved! You are amazing! You are unique! And you are wanted!
Do not get lost in someone else's world that is not meant for you to live in. Do not give someone who is not worth it every bit of your- self. Nobody can use the power that is only meant for you. Feel and know your worth. Use what you were taught to teach you a lesson to know you have another chance at life. Live it to the fullest because life is giving you another chance to plant your seeds. Take care of them by watering them, nurturing them throughout all seasons, and watch your flowers bloom.
The question you are asking yourself as of now is—how much better can it get than this? My love, oh wait, and see your life is unfold- ing like a lotus flower that is flourishing on top of the mud that tried to drown you. How much better can it get than this? So much better!
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