MARRYING A PSYCHOPATH

Chapter 4

Napakaganda kong bride.

Nakaupo ako sa harap ako ng salamin. Tapos na akong ayusan at nakasuot na ako ng wedding gown na best choice mismo ni Amanda (Hindi ko na sya maatim na tawaging Ninang. Bakit pa? Wala na ako ni katiting na paggalang sa kanilang lahat. )

I can't help grimacing watching my appeareance.

Alam ko sa sarili kong hindi ako panget. I'm used to people complimenting my suferficial. And it's not boasting but I like my face this way because it reminds me of my loving mom. Kamukhang kamukha ko sya nung kasing edad nya ako.

Pero kung isa ito sa mga naging pinto para makapasok ako sa sitwasyon na 'to, hindi ko alam kung magiging proud pa ba ako na ganito ang mukha ko.

Kung hindi ito ang naging mukha ko, pipiliin pa rin ba nila ako?

Pero kung hindi nila ako pinili, maililigtas ko ba si Daddy?

I wonder.

Naalala ko nung new years day ang saya saya pa naming nanood ng fireworks display. Kumikinang ang mga mata nina Mommy at Daddy. Punong puno kami ng pag-asa. Sinong magaakalang ikakasal ako ngayong taon... Sa mamamatay tao pa.

Ni hindi nga ako sure kung si Alexis na nga ang lalaking papakasalan ko pagdating ng araw. Tapos nangyare ito.

"Are you ready, Mrs. Lee? "

Napaangat ang tingin ko sa reflection ni Simon sa salamin na seryosong nakamasid saakin mula sa likuran ko.

I can't tell if he's mocking me or what.
This house is filled with insincere lunatic people with their ever sincere face.

I give him a cold stare. I'm less threteaned of him. Instead he disgusted me.

I always thought he's a good person. Hindi ko sya close nung high school kami dahil masyado akong dumidistansya sa lahat noon pero napapansin ko sya. Matalino sya at mabait sa lahat. I never thought he could tolerate all of this. What a lunatic!

Nang tumayo ako saka ko lang napagtuonan ng pansin ang ganda at garbo ng gown ko na may mga kumikinang na beads.

Nakakasukang gown! Gustong kong gula gulanitin ang tela nito.

"Wow! That million dollar gown suits perfect on you! " he commented, eyeing me from head to toe. "It's a petty they'll just going to throw it after."

"Should I wear it forever, then? " sarkastiko kong tugon.

He laughs. "I'm just kidding, come 'on. Hide that gloomy face of you, will you? He'll be happy seeing you happy. You know, he's in a bad shape today."

Kusang tumaas ang isang kilay ko.

And? Do I care? Kailangan ko pa bang tanungin kong sinong namatay ngayon? Gusto kong itanong pero tinikom ko ang bibig ko. From now on, I have to control my mouth to survived him.

"He'd prefer marrying you at the backyard of his house but he chose not to for your sake. " Simon added. Para bang normal na tao lang ang binabanggit nya. "Ayaw nyang ikasal ka na pagod sa byahe. He's doing you a favor. He really loves you. "

Love?

The word triggered me so much I couldn't restrain myself from saying anything to show him I'm not enjoying his story. "Have you ever pissed your cousin off? "

Nawala ang amusement sa mukha nya dahil sa tanong ko.

"Perhaps.. Never! Dahil kung oo, wala ka na siguro ngayon. That's why you stayed a puppet. "

Nagwalk-out ako pagkasabi ko nun. Nakita ko sa hitsura nyang napikon sya.

But I don't care. Hindi ko ipapakita sa kanila na takot ako.

Is this a house or a mental institution? The latter was more appropriate.

"Do youself a favor, Kira, " he said. His voice lull me from hardly slamming the door."Know when to shut up.  That way you can stay alive. "

There was a long pause before he  drops his final word. "Stay alive as you can. "

The 'as' sounded like 'if'. I couldn't tell if its really 'if'or 'as'. Stay alive if you can or stay alive as you can. Whatever it is, the information was clear; he was telling me I'd be dead any moment after this wedding.

The ceremony ( my death ceremony not a wedding ceremony) has began.

What a damn crazy family! Tuwang tuwa sila at palakpak nang palakpak habang naglalakad ako palapit sa halimaw nilang anak na nakatayo sa dulo na animo'y marangal at kagalang galang na tao. Curse him!

Sinasabuyan ako ng mga bulaklak but instead of scenting flowers, I smell blood.

Everything is  like a nightmare.

"Wow! You're the most beautiful bride I've ever had. " nakakasindak na bulong saakin ni Prince pagkuha na pagkuha nya ng kamay ko. I almost fainted because I don't want him to touch me. I REALLY DON'T.

Walang judge o pari ang nandito, kami kami lang at ilang mga tauhan.
I thought of running away as he swore his vows. He sounded sincere, looked so sincere, but his eyes... It was cold and empty, it was lack of emotion, lack of remorse, lack of emphaty... lack of everything.

He scares the hell shit of me. He's not a human being inside. I'm marrying a demon.

This was my thought when something registered in me.

Nawalan na ako ng lakas. Both of my knees were shaking terribly. Umiikot na ang bituka ko pati paningin ko. My breathing becomes rag. I think I'm going to faint.

Parang kahit hangin kaya akong liparin ngayon sa sobrang hina ko.

I am the most beautiful? I AM NOT THE FIRST BRIDE? Where is she? No. WHERE ARE THEY?

Suddenly I'm vizualizing images of dead bodies, people I never actually meet, wearing a ring, was abused, tortured, died in vain, and dumped somewhere far from home.

I take a step back. I couldn't do it. I couldn't marry someone this evil and heartless. I couldn't let him kill me. I am not ready to die yet. This isn't happening.

I am.... I am going home.

I was preparing to leave, run away as fast I could ,

And that's when I passed out.

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