Right Hand On My Heart

I Like This Mess I've Made So Far

After getting that call from Dave, Kirk was still a little on edge but he was able to calm down despite the circumstances. He's distressed that Dave is in trouble, but now that Dave was honest with him and he has a vague idea of what's going on Kirk feels he can better handle his emotions. Besides, he doesn't want to cry and snot all over James again. The way he threw himself at the older guy and snivelled pathetically was embarrassing enough already. He doesn't need a repeat of that, for his own sake if not for James.

When he was finally done crying and wallowing in self-pity, James took it upon himself to make Kirk as comfortable as possible. James checked and secured every room, making sure everything was locked and latched up. It was more for Kirk's peace of mind than it was in preparation for an actual threat. James didn't fully believe Menza or otherwise would send guys over to terrorise them. Menza was a professional and if he gave you deadline, he'd honor it. Gar on the other hand, there was no telling if he'd try anything or not. James wants to say Gar isn't that stupid, but James has been wrong in the past.

Either way, he does a sweep of the house regardless to make sure no one will be getting in while Kirk is downstairs watching tv. James, admittedly, lingers in Dave and Kirk's room and sort of... snoops, for lack of a better word. It's a habit he ultimately can't ignore; built up over years of investigating and following his targets. It's pretty much a regular bedroom, but James takes his time and looks at all the photos adorning the dressers and walls.

It's mostly photos of Kirk and Dave together, memories they've shared together forever crystalized in snapshots. There's even a few of them that look like they were taken in a photo booth; the kind that come in a strip with four miniature photos stacked on top of one another in a line. The first one in the strip is both men making silly faces with their tongues out, the second is another obligatory silly one, followed by them sharing a genuine smile, and the fourth and final one depicts Kirk leaning over and kissing a bemused Dave on the cheek. Dave looks so undeniably happy that it's almost hard for James to believe that this is the same Dave he's known for ages. It wasn't like Dave was completely devoid of feeling and emotion, it was just never this noticeable before.

James looks at the other ones as well; pictures of them taken on their birthdays, holidays, or just random outings together. There's a picture of a sweet looking little old lady standing proudly next to a small boy with glasses on the nightstand next to the bed and James has to assume it's Kirk and his mother. There's even a picture of Dave sleeping that Kirk, undoubtedly, took. Dave's hair is a mess and his body is contorted into an interesting shape, not to mention the very pronounced puddle of drool on the pillow. James is sure that Dave absolutely hates this photo, but the fact that he allowed it to be framed and put on display speaks volumes of just how in love he is with Kirk.

Funny how one picture can tell you everything you need to know about someone and it's as asinine as a picture of Dave sleeping of all things. James wishes everyone was as easy to read as Dave, but maybe Dave's predictable because they've been friends for so long. Kirk on the other hand was a puzzle yet to be fully solved and James has to admit he likes the challenge so far.

Once he's done obsessing over Dave and Kirk's room, James takes one last peek in all the rooms upstairs before heading back down. James descends the stairs and spies Kirk lounging on the couch with his feet pulled up onto the cushions. He was on his phone, texting probably, while the tv played some crime procedural in the background. It's as if Kirk hasn't a care in the world; he doesn't even look like he was crying his heart out fifteen minutes ago. Kirk just looks like he's waiting for James to come down and curl up on the sofa with him. And if James tries hard enough he can even convince himself that, yes, it is just a normal day of them staying in and cuddling each other. But this isn't James' home and Kirk isn't his.