He always knew that I was sad but he didn't know how bad it really was. I thought I was strong, but the thoughts came back. I don't know why but I just get hit with this wave of sadness and the urge to hurt myself overcame me.
I had no strength left. Without hesitation I ran to the bathroom and locked the door. I immediately opened the drawer and took out the razor, pulling it apart to get the blades. I collapsed onto the cold bathroom floor. I then started the count down in my head. One...two....three. I dug the blade into my skin and moved from my arm to my thigh. I was so destroyed up inside with what I was doing I didn't here Luke come home.
"Babe?" he called looking around the house.
"Y/N?" he came up the stairs but i couldn't hear him through my loud cries. He now stood outside the door and knocked.
"Are you ok? Y/n? open the door!" I continued to sob as i dragged myself on the floor further away from the door. Blood gushing down my arm and thighs. I curled up in a ball and continued to cry in my my own blood. I heard a loud bang on the door and then a crack. The next thing I know I'm in Luke's arms. He's kissing my head and rocking back and forth to calm me down. He's pulling my hair back so that I'm not pulling it out myself with stress. I'm crying hysterically while he's holding me and rubbing my back. After a while he picks me up and puts me on the bathroom counter. He grabs some band aids and some tissues. He wets the tissues and starts to cleanup the blood on my wrists and thighs. So many thoughts were flowing through my mind. I finally look up to see that Luke had been crying as well. His face was red and he had tears streaming down his face. He sniffed as he continued to clean my fresh cuts. I lifted my hand up and cupped under his jaw line. He looked at me and I could see the pain in his eyes. After he finished putting the band aids on he picked the blade up from the floor.
"Why?" he asked looking hurt. I just looked away. Luke pick up the blade and slit his own wrist.
"LUKE WHAT THE HELL?! DONT!" I yelled hopping off the counter. He then flushed the blade down the toilet. I grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his wrist holding it there. I looked up at him with tears streaming down my face, waiting for him to speak."Now you know how i feel when you watch someone you care about hurts themselves, you shouldn't do this to yourself. You're perfect and you don't deserve this. I love you."
We were both in tears as I wrapped my arms around his waist and buried my face into his chest. I cleaned up his cut just like he did to me then placed a bandaid on his wrist. "Promise me you won't do this. Because if you do it I will." he cups my face and kisses me. "I promise. I love you" I kiss him once more. "I love you too y/n."
