Platonic Hamilton Oneshots

-Angst thing that I needed to write-

Sorry I haven't updated this book in a while ;-; I like to make Burr suffer sorry

Tw:
Attempted suicide
Mentions of suicide
Angst
(Oh boy..)
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Alexander, John, Lafayette, Hercules and Burr were hanging out at a park. Well it's mainly everyone but Burr. He was feeling left out but he wasn't surprised. This always happens.

Alexander and his friends would always invite him to hang out and he'd just feel left out.

Aaron just want to at least try to get some sleep. He has been exhausted for the pass few days and he couldn't get any sleep. What made things worse, it seemed like no one noticed his eyes getting baggy

He looked at Alexander and his friends. They were all smiling. They always seemed to do that. Nothing seemed to hold them down when they were together. Burr felt jealous, he wanted to feel like nothing could hold him down, he craved it. But more than ever, he craved their friendship. He has never been in a relationship like theirs. Their friendship was pure, nothing like Burr has ever gotten. No, all he has gotten were a bunch of people who never cared for him, and those who did either left him or died.

That made him feel worthless, seeing how they have a strong pure bond that he had always wanted. They had someone to fight for them, they always had a shoulder to cry on, someone to comfort them, someone.... to care about them.

Aaron silently sighed. He was getting those thoughts again.

He had always hated having those thought. He tried to push them away but they were too strong this time. He wanted to go home to at least try to sleep those thoughts away.

It was already late, around 11pm, might as well call it a night

"Hey I think I should go home now." Aaron said grabbing his bag

"Oh ok Aaron. Do you want one of us to walk you home?" Alexander asked

"No thanks." Aaron replied

"Ok bye Aaron!" Alexander and the others said

Aaron started to walk away from the group and as soon as he turned the corner those thoughts flooded his mind.

Aaron mentally groaned. He tried his best to ignore them and just go home and for a while he succeeded. Until one thought, that was a tad bit louder than the rest and was different than what those thoughts usually said, caught his attention and made his stop dead in his tracks.

There is a cliff just up that road

Aaron turned his head in the direction his thoughts told him to. He remembered that that was a trail leading uphill to a cliff view of the city...and he remembered how high the cliff was...there weren't any guardrails there to stop him-

No. No, he would not do that. Having these thoughts were not true. They are not true....

But...would anyone even notice he was gone...it is not like he contributes much to anything...

Aaron wasn't sure how long he stood there arguing with himself but the next thing he knew, he was on a different direction then he was before. He was now going uphill. Not paying attention to anything around him. It didn't even feel like he was moving his body, it seemed like the body was moving on it's own and Aaron just let it.

He was at the top when he took out a sheet of paper and started writing something down.

Dear whoever reads this,
By the time you read this I will be gone. Not that it matters, no one really cares for me or even notices me at all. It'll be a miracle if anyone reads this or even remembers me. So overall nothing would really change. Everything I do fails, everyone who cares for me either dies or leaves. So it's better if I die first so no one else will. Or who knows, maybe I can't even die right. Maybe that is my punishment for living. If I do happen to die, it will be the first thing I've ever done right. Anyway this is goodbye, to whoever cares about me

~A.Burr

As he re-read the note, a chill went down his spine.

I really am going to do this

--

"Hey I think I should go home now." Aaron said grabbing his bag

"Oh ok Aaron. Do you want one of us to walk you home?" Alexander asked

"No thanks." Aaron replied

"Ok bye Aaron!" Alexander and the others said

Around five minutes went by and everyone decided to go home. They all started walking when Lafayette saw something moving in the corner of his eye

"Mon ami's is-is that Aaron?" Laf said confused.

Everyone stopped walking at looked at the trail. To see Aaron almost to the top of the cliff

"Yeah it is.... Does..does he know he is going the wrong way." Hercules wondered

"Hey Aaron! You do know your going the wrong way! Right?"

Aaron didn't answer

"Rude." John said

"Maybe he can't hear you. Let's catch up to him, I have a bad feeling a out this..." Alexander said

--

Aaron placed the note down, and he stood there for one more minute. Wondering if he was sure he wanted to do this. This was a permanent decision he was going to take. Ultimately, his mind landed on yes.

He looked at the view, it was beautiful view. The lights of the city and the stars slightly brightening the dark sky. Aaron didn't even mind that this was the going to be the last thing he was going to see. (I am listening to Shine a Light rn and Say My Name just played)

He walked up the the edge not paying attention to anything else, he took a deep breath closed his eyes and took a step

Before he fell he felt a pair of arms wrap around his chest pull him backwards. He was on the ground, and he realized that someone was...hugging him? Aaron was confused

"AARON ARE YOU INSANE?!" He heard John's voice laced with fear. He realized that it was Alexander hugging him being surprisingly quiet

"Mom ami why would you try to do that?!" Laf exclaimed

"Do you realize that once you do it you can't turn back! And do you realize how terrifying it is to find that you wrote this?!" Hercules said holding up the note

Alexander buried his head in Aaron's shoulder

"I..well I-i wasn't p-planning t-to-×" Aaron tried to explain but stopped when he heard Alexander sniffing and Aaron realized that Alexander was crying. Aaron never expected Alexander to cry "A-alexander?"

Alexander hugged Aaron harder "Please...don't leave..don't leave us...please."

Aaron blinked "I..don't understand.." Was all he could say

Everyone got on their knees facing Aaron with concern in their eyes.

"What do you mean you don't understand?"

"W-why would you save me?" Aaron closed his eyes, he didn't want to see their reactions to that. He could feel Alexander's grip tighten

"Don't say that...ever again. Don't do this again. I can't lose someone else like this.."

"W-what do you mean Alexander?" Aaron opened his eyes to see the others look at each other. Aaron realized this was a story he told the others.

"Back in the Caribbean...After my mother d-died, me and my brother moved in with our cousin.. A-and one day I-i walked in to see him h-hanging from the roof." Alexander didn't hide that he was crying even more.

"O-oh Alexander, I-i am so sorry-"

"I-i don't want that to be y-you! P-please don't let it be you, I won't be able to take it. We care about you too much." Alexander grabbed Aaron's shoulder's to make Aaron face him.

At this point Aaron started crying, it started out as just a few tears but then turned into sobbing in just a few seconds. At this, everyone hugged Aaron witch made him cry even more. He has never felt this much love before. It felt amazing.

"I promise that wont be me." Aaron smiled