Better Together

Chapter 37: I'll Never Stop...

I woke up to light cries from beside me, but my heart shattered at the sound. Clarke must've thought I was still asleep. When I looked over, I could see her helplessly covering her mouth with her eyes clenched shut. It was obvious she was in a lot of pain. What do you say to someone in that amount of pain? It's not like I know what she's going through because she won't even talk to me. She told me some stuff yesterday, and I'm grateful for the progress. However, she needs to tell me everything, so I can help her.

After a few moments of internal debate, I decide to wrap my arms around her. I don't say anything. I just want her to know I'm here. She instantly starts sobbing harder, and she turns to face me. She buries herself in my chest so hard I'd think she's trying to make me absorb her if I didn't know better. She digs her nails into my back so hard I'm sure it will leave marks, but I don't mind. I've felt worse pain, and obviously she's hurting. 

"Shhh... you're okay," I whisper. I continue whispering reassurances to her for what had to be at least an hour before she finally calms down. 

"Sorry I woke you up," she whispers guiltily.

"It's okay my love," I tell her with a smile.  "Do you want to talk about it?" I ask tentatively.

"Not with you," she mutters. 

"Hmmm?" I ask. If I was being a honest, I was a little offended. She can tell me anything, and she knows this yet there's someone else she'd rather tell before me? Then again, maybe it's something having to do with me, so she CAN'T tell me... I hope not. 

"I want to tell someone, but I don't think I can tell you," she whispers, and I can see the guilty look on my face.

"You want to tell me, but you don't think you can?" I ask for clarification.

She just nods and looks down. I grab her face gently and make her look at me. I kiss her cheek and get out of bed. She whimpers at the loss, but gets up nonetheless. "You're studying with Raven today then? You can tell her?" I question. She nods and smiles. 

We dress in silence, but it's not awkward. It's just understanding. I understand that she's not ready to talk to me, and she understands that we don't have anything else to talk about with each other right now. 

She leaves to go to Raven's room, and I go to the workout room. Just like in my old homes, I'm using it as an outlet for my frustration. I'm not frustrated with anyone, just the circumstances. 

Clarke's POV

"Hey Raven," I whisper as I enter her room. We discussed a time the other day, so I knew it would just be her in the room.

"Hey Griff. What's up?" she asks curiously.

"Before we do school stuff, can I talk to you?" I ask. I really

"Of course," she answers while shifting to make room for me on her bed.

"No one else is in her right?" I ask nervously. I REALLY don't want anyone else to hear what I'm going to say. 

"No. Why are you so paranoid?" she asks, but her tone isn't harsh. Only curious.

"I don't want anyone else to hear what I'm going to say," I respond.

"It's okay. Your secret is safe with me," she tells me honestly.

"How do I say this," I chuckle darkly while fidgeting. 

"Take your time," she encourages. 

"Okay, I guess I should start at the beginning," I explain to her everything I dreamed. From the wedding day to everything going black. I even told her about seeing my dad which had her in tears for a few moments. She was listening intently, and she managed to keep her comments to herself until I finished.