Carl Grimes One Shots (carl x reader)

I'm Fine.

Word Count (including bold text): 1243

I breathe heavily as I pound my shovel into the hole of the ground again. I've been out digging two graves for an hour now- I'm almost finished the first one. It doesn't seem like it would take an hour to dig one grave, but in sweltering heat with minimal energy it really does. 

Even though I'm dripping in sweat, I'm getting dizzy, and my arms are weak, I still continue to dig. It's my family that I'm putting in the ground, the last of my loved ones. I will not let someone else dig their grave, and I'm pushing myself to get it done before noon. I try to shake off my dizziness and get back to work. 

After some time the first grave is finished, so I stop to take a short break. I balance my arm on my shovel and wipe the beads of sweat off of my forehead as I try to control my breathing. I want to dig both graves completely before putting my mom and my brother in them. 

Last night there was a walker attack. My mom and brother were taking watch. Rick and Michonne were on the other side of the prison. They heard screams so they rushed over, and found walkers biting my family. Rick told me it looked like they were investigating a hole in the fence and since it was dark outside they couldn't see. I'm completely broken now, so I'm doing everything I can to keep myself busy and keep my mind off of it. However, I'm handling this better than I ever thought I would. Probably because it hasn't fully sunk in yet. 

Another hour passed and I'm almost finished digging the second grave when I hear footsteps behind me. 

"Y/N?"

I turn around to see Carl looking at me concerned. I try to speak but I don't know what to say anymore, so I just turn back around and continue digging. 

"Y/N, are you okay?" Carl asks.

"I'm fine, Carl," I say without stopping digging. 

"You've been out here for nearly three hours and you skipped breakfast and didn't have anything to drink. You're not fine, you need to eat. Or at least drink. Come on out and take a break," Carl demands. 

"I said I'm fine, Carl," I say a little more sternly. 

"Y/N you're completely pale and look like you're going to pass out any second. At least let me help you?" Carl pulls up another shovel, which I didn't happen to see when he came down. 

"No, I said I'm-"

"You're not fine, dammit. You can't do this to yourself! We're all worried about you, please come inside or like I said, at least let me help you," Carl pleads. 

"Fucking hell," I mutter as I slam my shovel into the dirt and look up at him. "I'm not going anywhere until my family is in the ground with flowers placed above them. I'm doing this by myself. I. Am. Fine." At these words I stumble a bit, getting dizzy again. I can see Carl starting to move my way but I stop him. "Don't. I just need to do this."

Giving up, Carl turns away back to the prison. 

After a little while I finish the graves and realize I ran into a problem. How am I gonna get my mom and brother down here properly? I'm not just going to throw them in, of course. The thought of having to bury my family sickens me as reality hits. I have to bury them. They're gone. Forever. I feel hot tears slide down my cheek, but I wipe them away quickly knowing it will only slow me down. I have to do this. I have to. 

I end up being able to strategically lower them into the ground, and I started out by covering them both halfway. I hear footsteps behind me again. 

"What the hell do you want, Carl?" I say as I spin around. Fortunately I was right about it being Carl because it would have been pretty embarrassing otherwise. 

Carl didn't look startled at all. In fact, he looked pretty pissed; arms folded and a slight frown on his face. "Y/N you're coming back right now. You can finish tomorrow or later tonight but you need to rest. You need to eat. You need water. You are not telling me 'no', you are following me right now." 

"Why the fuck do you even care? What's in it for you? Rick say he'll let you off of chores tomorrow if you get me inside?" I yell at him. 

"No, he didn't. I care about you. I need you to be okay. To be safe."

"I think it's best you leave me alone right now, I'm not in the mood."

"You're upset, Y/N. You don't know what to do so you're yelling at me to get it out, and that's okay. So we can do this the easy way or the hard way. Coming with me?" He asks. 

"Fuck no. I'm not following your damn- what the hell Carl put me down!" I yell as he scoops me up in his arms. I try to fight him and get myself down but Carl's too strong. I try to wiggle my way out the entire way to the prison until he plops me on the bed of his cell. He shuts the curtain and I stand up trying to shove past him, but he's blocking the doorway. "Let me out. Now."

"No."

"Carl you can't control me! I'm my own person! Let me go you asshole!" I shout at him.

"You really need to just relax and calm down. You're scaring us, going crazy like this!" He yells back. 

"I am not going fucking crazy!" I shove his shoulders pushing him into a nearby wall. "I'm not crazy, Carl, I'm fine! I'm fine!" I yell as I continue to shove him. "Stop caring and let me go! I'm fine! I'm fine. I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine..." I start crying and slowly sink the floor with my back against the wall. I place my head in my hands as tears fall down my face. I was doing good with keeping my tears in, but I couldn't hold it any longer. 

Carl rushes over and wraps his arms tight around me. He kisses the top of my head and whispers, "It's okay," into my hair. 

I continue to sob and pull Carl into me, placing my head into his neck. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to... You can leave I'm just an annoying piece of shit." 

"No, don't talk about yourself like that. You're not. You're amazing and smart and kind and brave and... and beautiful."

"Thank you, Carl," I say after some time. I wipe my eyes when I finally calm down and look up at him. I stand up and Carl does the same. "Can- Can I stay? It's fine if you don't want me to, I shouldn't even have asked-"

"Of course," Carl says with a big smile. He lays down on the bed with his arms wide open. "Come here." 

I slide into the bed and Carl grabs my waist and shoulder pulling me into him even more. I snuggle into his chest and close my eyes. "I'm not fine," I whisper. 

"I know," Carl whispers drawing circles on my back. "I know." 

Still crying while writing these. He's so cute. Let me know what else you would like to read!