Life Time in Repeat (Sope fic)

Chapter 25: Clarity

"Welcome, you've finally made peace."

When I finally came back to all I saw was white, Yoongi, and a hooded figure. I was so lost as I sat up and went to check on Yoongi. "Darling? Are you ok?" I asked and helped him up. Yoongi looked just as startled as I did. "W-where are we? Hobi?" He grasped my hand tightly and I did the same. We looked back to the other mysterious figure and stayed close to each other. This place had some weird familiarity but I couldn't tell what it was. 

"It's okay, you both have reached peace in your death so you can move on," they spoke with an ambiguous tone. Confusion filled my mind as I tried to process it. I wasn't dead... I was alive and just woke up. "But I didn't d-die..." I said gently looking at them. What also threw me was that Yoongi just took that in. Was this just some long elaborate dream? No, it couldn't be because I felt everything... there was no way I dreamed this all up. I could even feel how real Yoongi's hand was.

The other moved to me and gently reached out a bony hand to me. "This may help you remember," They spoke and showed me a pill bottle with my name on it. Another headache rushed through my head before the memories started to come from the repressions in my mind. 

The night I read Yoongi's letter to me after committing suicide I didn't just go to bed, I had taken a handful of the sleeping medication I was on to help me after his death. So I had just fallen asleep that night, I just didn't wake up. My mind must of suppressed that because I was too afraid to admit I had gotten that low. I felt so stupid for forgetting something like that and believing I had magically gone back to have a do over. Yoongi reached over to cup my face and wipe my tears gently before kissing me. "Hobi... it's ok, I know how scary it is when you realize you did that," he spoke softly bringing me back from my spiral. I sniffled and hugged him tightly as I cried a bit. 

"So that entire time was just an illusion?" I finally asked looking at the mysterious figure. They nodded and retracted their hand standing back up. "Yes, but your interactions with each other are real. The love, tears, passion was all real just not your friends or surroundings," they explained. It was bitter sweet hearing that. So it meant being with Yoongi was real... we are in love and happy but seeing our friends, the dance competitions, the parties was all manufactured. 

"Can.. we see our friends... just a glimpse to see if they are ok?" Yoongi said gently and rubbed his eyes from the stray tears. The other person nodded and instead of being in the white room we were seeing our friends. Some of them seemed to lose the life in their eyes but others seemed to be trying to move on. 

Jungkook seemed to be still holding on but at least he was with Jimin to make sure he was ok. Jimin seemed to be in a strange state of numbness but acceptance. Then there was Taehyung who was a lot like Jimin but he was alone. Then seeing Namjoon and Jin, Joon was packing his things and Jin was helping signaling that they broke up. It hurt seeing them in such divided places instead of happy and together as a group like they had seen in the dream sate. Seeing their smiling faces and how different they were in what we had just lived through. Jimin and Jungkook being successful dancers and a happy couple, Tae and Jin being the power couple, and then Namjoon with my old friend Jackson. It felt so real and so nice but the fact was that that wasn't reality. We were living in a dream and our friends were broken and saddened by our deaths. This reality was much more hard to swallow than the one that was fake. 

"They all miss you both dearly, its only been a few months since Hoseok's passing," the guide spoke as the room returned to white, "is there anything else you'd like to see before I move you both on to your own forever state?" Yoongi and I stood there still in shock and tears as we processed what was happening. Months since my death and over a year since Yoongi's... it was a lot to process and accept after just what felt like moments ago we were at our shared apartment watching tv and cuddling. 

I felt like crying harder but that wasn't gonna change the situation. "There isn't a way to actual have a do over is there," I asked with a broken wavering voice. the other just shook their head and sighed, "there is not. But when you both are moved on to your forever state you'll reincarnate and have a new life. You are both destined for each other this was just a doomed timeline for you both." A doomed time line huh. The cherry on top of everything. 

I rubbed some of the ears out of my eyes using my sleeve and looked over at Yoongi smiling best I could and took his hand in mine. "What do you say darling... should we move on and get to try again for sure next time, or do you want to ask more questions?" I asked softly. Yoongi had tears streaming down his pale cheeks and his lip quivered as hesitance filled his eyes. He clutched my hand tighter and moved closet to me pulling me into another hug and kiss. "I'm so sacred Hoseok... promise me you'll find me in our next life and never let me go like in this one?" He asked through gentle sobs and tears. All I could do is nod and hold him as tight as I could. "I p-promise, I promise Yoongi I will find you again and never let you go we wont make this mistake again."

As I finished and I clung to Yoongi I felt a warmth and a feeling of calm wash over me before everything was white and my last thought was Yoongi.