Chapter 51: Lila and Zooey

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The girls clinked spoons together and dug into the shared Richardson's sundae between them. It was a ceremony of sorts. They were parked out near "the spot" facing out at the ocean, watching as the waves crashed far out in the distance. They had done this so many times before in the warm months, but this time was different. It was no average Thursday evening. This evening was significant. This evening was the last evening where Lila and Zooey would sit on the hood of Lila's car, eating ice cream, and still be high school students. This was the evening before it all ended, before a chapter of their lives officially closed.

Zooey took a dollop of whipped cream, stealing one of the maraschino cherries immediately and shoving it in her mouth with a delighted hum. Lila opted to go straight for ice cream, gathering up a little bit of everything: vanilla ice cream, hot fudge, whipped cream, and sprinkles. She let out a pleasant groan as the two gobbled down a few more bites.

"I still can't believe it," Zooey said, awe-struck.

"You've said that ten times already tonight," Lila laughed. She brought the other maraschino cherry to her lips with a grin before popping it into her mouth.

"I know, but," Zooey said with a pause. "It's just the truth. It's over. It's finally over."

She let out a happy sigh and laid down, her limbs sprawled out on the car as her long, blond waves fell delicately around her. They seemed to glow in the setting sun. Lila had always been so jealous of Zooey's golden hair, the way her dark eyebrows gave her face an entirely different level of drama and edge. But Zooey envied Lila, too. She was far curvier than Zooey was, with larger breasts and a rounded butt and thighs. But Zooey knew Lila could still be insecure about these parts of her body even when she had no reason to be. It brought them both a level of comfort and mutual understanding, knowing the other had parts of themselves they couldn't appreciate fully.

"Are you excited about orientation this summer?" Lila asked, though she already knew the answer.

"Beyond," Zooey gushed. "I have the days counted down on my calendar. I can't wait to actually see the campus in person; walk through the buildings, meet people, new people!"

She let out a happy moan and lifted her body up for another spoonful of ice cream. But with Lila's silence, Zooey's body stiffened. Perhaps she shouldn't have reacted so elated to Lila's question. Zooey wasn't oblivious. She knew graduating from high school for her and Lila looked very different. Zooey was off to live in a totally different place in just a few, short months, and Lila would be staying here. It wasn't a secret. But Zooey was excited to leave, and as much as she knew Lila was bummed, she didn't want to just hide her eagerness and pretend like she wasn't looking forward to it just because that's maybe what would help Lila feel better. Still, she didn't have to be off-the-charts-level-one-hundred thrilled about it every time her departure was mention, whether from herself or otherwise.

It was just exciting to finally have a chance to start over. She could be whoever she wanted to be in Chicago without being surrounded by anyone who had the knowledge of who she was while in Borne. Nothing felt more exhilarating to her than that. But where they sat now, the mood was somber, and Zooey didn't know how to make it better.

"And I can't wait to tell you all about it," Zooey finally added, giving Lila's shoulder a nudge.

But even as Zooey said the words, her stomach constricted, and it only felt as though she had made it worse. Lila tried to manage a genuine smile, but if she were being honest, she didn't want to hear about Zooey's orientation. Not because she didn't care, but because she knew there was no way it wouldn't be an amazing, everything-you-could-have-hoped-for, incredible time. Zooey could talk to anyone; there was no way she wouldn't come out of that short weekend with anything less than twenty new friends. Lila just didn't like thinking about that. She didn't like thinking that Zooey could go off and find a new best friend in that one weekend. Someone funnier than her, cooler than her... better than her.

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