Twisted Reality

EIGHT

It was one of those days. You know those days when you wake up and you're just moody and you can't tell why. From that point on everything else seems to be absolute shit and you just feel yourself in a daze. Somehow living the day but not actually being in it.

That was most days for me. However, sometimes it was worse than others and it showed more. This was one of the days it shadowed over me. Over my thoughts.

It was an incredible amount of effort to pull myself out of bed and do my usual morning tradition because I didn't want to look like a slob. I didn't want to wear pain on my sleeve.

By the time I got down, I was aware that I won't have the time to enjoy my walk to school. My parents weren't down which is not a big surprise. I briefly considered breakfast but then I decided that missing one day is not such a big deal.

It didn't take long to get to school because I rushed through the process. I knew this was the part where you expect me to see Adan and for some reason that would baffle me, he would be the only person to see past my walls. My fake smile. My empty laughs. I knew this was supposed to be the moment that he showed me there was more to him than laughs and jokes. I knew it was supposed to be the moment I fell in love with him without realizing it.

And that would have happened if we weren't people living in the real world. People obstructed by their own thoughts and their own dramas and their own life.

I mean I did see him. And he did look at me but he didn't do what all the movie heroes does. He didn't see past the fake smile I sent to him or past the tremor in my little wave.

Maybe deep down, I actually wanted him to recognize it. Or maybe I didn't. I didn't know. But I didn't feel some huge disappointment lurk in my heart. I didn't feel some ache that he didn't rush over to fill my heart and fix me.

I didn't feel anything.

I felt someone tap my shoulder, pulling me out of my thoughts and into remembrance of the world around me. A world I really didn't want to remember just yet.

I smiled. "Hey you"

Lance wiggled his brows. Apart from Betty, he was the only other person I actually felt relaxed with. It was quiet funny really. We weren't best friends. We weren't even that close. And we never were. He was... he was the kind of person that was a bigger idiot around you.

"You looked spaced out"

I tapped my chin, blinking in thought. I did a huge dramatic gasp. Widened my eyes. "No way. Could that be because... uhm I was spaced out?"

Lance laughed at my obvious sarcasm. You would think that with Lance being friends with me and all, he and Betty would be close. But they weren't. All they said with each other was the basic hey greetings.

He patted my short hair. I have always hated the fact that my hair was not flowing. It was more of falling to my neck and into my eyes.

"Are you ever going to not be sarcastic?"

"Awn probably not" I teased back which of course caused him to roll his eyes.

Like why was that even a reaction?

He tilted his head to look at me. "We haven't talked in a while you know"

"We never talk in a lot of whiles" I retorted, sticking out my tongue a little.

"I'm a busy man" He said back trying to flex his arms. I couldn't resist it. A full one chuckle escaped my lips. He looked so serious, so real that it was impossible not to laugh.

I patted his cheek."You sure are Lancey"

He groaned, snapping my hand off his cheek which only caused me to laugh harder. His expression was so priceless.

"Why do I put up with you?" He groaned, rubbing at his forehead like I was the cause of some bad headache. I of course smiled cheekily at his expression.

"Maybe cause you love me" I sing songed, jumping a little on my toes.

He brushed the hair from my eyes, a tiny smile on his lips. This was supposed to be the part we were suspended in air- in time- and then he says something sweet right? No.

He brushed the hair that was falling into my eyes before tugging at it with a smile. And no, not the cute smile. I gasped, glaring at him while he cackled.

"No. I don't think I do"

And then he walked away and took away that few brief minutes of escape with him. I know people would say that some pain you don't get distracted from it but I think they're wrong.

You do get distracted. And I was so very distracted from the war that went on in my head. So as Lance walked away, the smile I had on before slipped from my lips and the distraction died a quick stabbing death. And then I was reminded. Oh I was reminded.

The demons hadn't stopped their play. They weren't even close to being done and I knew this.

Not making any comment, I closed my locker quietly before turning around and walking out of the gates.