Sometimes life plays its cruel tricks on you. It will make you think that today will be the day that you have been waiting for. The day that you finally moved on, that it was about time to let go and be happy. You think it finally let you escape the horrible memories that you kept hidden within you, that you finally able to cure that sadness that keeps you down.
He tried. God knows how much he tried. He tried putting her back to pieces. He tried fixing her. He tried loving her for her to forget the pain. He tried only to realize that no matter how much he try, how hard he try and how much emotions and love he gave her he can never fix her for she was the only one who can do that.
He can’t fix her. He can’t save her. That was something only she can do.
‘Dara please you have to eat,’ he whispered in a low voice begging but then she stayed firm curling in her bed hugging herself, staring blankly in the air, tears streaming down on her cheeks. Dongwook’s words were echoing in her head, his disgusted stares still lingered inside her. She deserved every word he said, she deserved the hate, she deserved all of it.
He was right after all. He was damn right and she even tried to lie and deny every of it.
He raked his hair as he knelt down on the floor leaning his head on the bed as he tightened his fist. He stared at her as she was curling in a ball, slowly letting pain and guilt eat her whole. He felt so helpless. He felt so useless, he felt every little pain pricked him in his skin, slowly, painfully as it dig deep within him.
It has been days since she stopped talking, she stopped eating. Since she stopped living and just lay there and let life and time passed her by. She finally give in to the pain, to the suffering, to the guilt. She let the pain and guilt eat every sliver of her, everything that was left of her.
‘Dara…’ he called to her as she turned away from him and soon he let out a sigh. He stood up as he walked out of her room. He slowly went to the studio as he sat in the middle of the room. Soon his tears streamed down his cheeks as he clutched his chest, nails digging on his skin. ‘You’re useless,’ he spat bitterly to himself. ‘You’re useless,’ he repeated as he ran his finger on his hair.
Everything was supposed to be okay. She finally smiled, she finally laughed but it was as if fate was playing with him as those smiles and her laugh was quickly taken away from his reach, from her reach.
Just when he thought that, that day could be the beginning of her healing it never was. Just when he thought that happiness finally presented itself to her, to him, it never was.
It was all a dream.
What could have been more painful than watching her punish herself for everything? She was punishing herself for everything she had done and he can’t do anything but stand there and be there for her when she clearly needed something more.
It breaks him to pieces seeing that no matter how hard he try nothing could seem to reach her.
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How To Save A Life
Fanfiction"As time goes on, you'll understand. What lasts, lasts; what doesn't, doesn't. Time solves most things. And what time can't solve, you have to solve yourself," -Haruki Murakami   an entry for Sky is the Limit Writing contest original story...
