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Nesscas🌻
Tw: Suicide Mention
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Dear Sun,
Hey, it's been a while since we talked huh? It can't be helped though, since it's not really possible for us to talk like we used to. Anyway, I hope you're doing well!
I want to give you some updates, your father is doing quite well, he was discharged from the hospital a few days ago and my mother and I have been looking after him as best as we can, he still misses you a lot though, he wishes you could come home. He's on new medication, but don't fret! I've done everything in my power to make sure he takes it regularly and keeps himself safe.
The rest of us are doing pretty well to, Tracy recently started Elementary School and my mom got a new job as a preschool teacher, notn only that, but my father's been doing more of an effort to be a part of our lives! As for your friends, they're doing well too, Nana's still as talkative as ever and Angie's abrasive attitude hasn't changed, my side is also good now, Paula's keeping up with her cooking, Jeff's still a nerd and Poo still rarely if ever talks, so nothing's really changed.
The only thing that changed really was the atmosphere, thing's don't feep as bright anymore, if anything they feel rather performative. It's as if upbeat attitudes feel a bit more... fake? Fraudulent? I'm not sure how to put it. Of course people would be down, news spreads quickly in a community as tight knit as ours...
It's been quite a while since we've spoken Sun, so I just want to ask you a question that's been on my mind since you left:
Why?
Do you not realize what you've caused? We still don't know how to feel, how to react, what to think, it all feels too soon, too sudden.
You're father's been a wreck ever since, we're all he has left Sun, and we're not even family.
It feels wrong, you just got up and left, leaving nothing but a messy note and a few of your clothes, for days we thought you went missing, and then we found that note...
Was this what you wanted? I'm not angry, I'm just upset and confused, you didn't say anything, there's no way I would have known, or we would have known. You kept to yourself too much, all you did was smile and help, smile and help, you never wanted help, you acted like you didn't need it, and then when things got too much for you to handle, you disappeared without a trace.
I want to be angry with you, but I can't be, I care too much about you to feel angry, I love you too much to feel angry.
But your choice hurt, and you're never coming home.
You should have said something, maybe I could have helped, maybe we could have helped, you should have told me you were struggling and that you didn't think you could continue down that path, I could have been able to support you.
You didn't have keep to yourself.
You didn't have to do it Sun.
You didn't have to kill yourself.
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Word count: 535
I forgot how bad this was ew lemme publish it anyway tho
