Purblind Heart

ONE - BENCH UNDER THE TREE

My favourite spot.

It was the time of the day when all I wanted to do was to break free from the maddening tribulations of life although I knew that I must deal with them, anyway. Maybe I just wanted to cease for a short while and munch some piece of liberation. When life gets tricky, I always make a way to repel from the game and its two 'sh': not the shimmer and shine thing but the shits and the shortcomings. The shits are those that really stink to death and the shortcomings are those which I can be able to laugh at. But then, they still suck.

I and my gorgeous ass was sitting in a wooden bench under a not-so-old oak tree. I decided to stay for about an hour-- no, maybe an hour and a half... okay, I admit, I was not totally convinced staying there that short. I chose to remain in my post until I found something interesting to meddle with. Well, not really a nosy person here but I don't feel sorry butting in on anyone's affairs as long as they concern to heart matters. Yeah, you heard it right.

I'm Cecilia Jones Harper, twenty-four, and currently working in a print media company where my column has always been the must-see and much awaited section in our mag. Care to know why? Well, most of the subscribers called me the 'love guru' and I was confident about how the rest of the world wanted to get to know me but I didn't make myself known in the section. I remained anonymous. The company where I work for and my colleagues were the only ones who know under the privacy protection contract we all have signed. I wasn't yet foreseeing a time when I would finally decide to unleash myself out to my avid clients. I loved my privacy and I didn't want people sticking their nose to my whereabouts and whatnots. Oops! I know what you're thinking... the golden rule: do not do unto others what you don't want others do unto you. But like what I said earlier, anything that concerns about the heart of the people in general was something I couldn't take for granted; moreover, that was something my career was pegged on though I wasn't sure if you may really call it a career. But I had to say it is! There was the fame and money that so many of us were craving after, giving us that star attraction and a feeling of power. Actually, I was talking of a power plugging in my spirit and not the merciless type of a juggernaut. But indeed, it was still a power I may claim especially being well compensated. Who wouldn't want that? And most of all, I felt responsible in contributing a good dose of compassion to mankind. In short, I was the stunning ambassador of love for humanity. That was how my inner monologue used to claim. But... there was this one thing that felt so out of the picture. I hated dealing with my own private matters of the heart. It was an off limit boundary and I had to just leave it that way. Life wasn't all about Cecilia, anyway.

The world needed me... Okay, not only me. Some of my kind. I mean every waking day, there were places where they only cared about sharing and exchanging guns and bombs. Sovereignty and racism were the object and pinnacle of the constant combat and the remnants were traces of those still under the same argument. Alicia Keys' song was right. We are here for all of us. So obviously, I wasn't the only one who wanted to become a catalyst for change. If still the sun is the center of the solar system, then love must still be the center of the world's attention.

"You asshole! Why don't you just leave it that way and get over me? After all, I had enough of you and all your fucked up lies!"

My almost perfect harmony and meditation was shaken and I got startled by a woman who stopped in front of me while yelling madly over the phone. Obviously and according to my ESP it must be her boyfriend on the other end. It was easy to tell. Screaming her anger and spatting those nasty words, she started crying and turned her phone off. She looked at me and made her way to the other end of the bench. She sat down and placed her hands to cover her pouring eyes. Then after the gushing moment she spoke.

"I'm sorry miss for intruding in your space. I just need to sit down to mend a little my shaking knees. Sorry if it's rude to say but I guess, it's a good thing you're blind. That way you can't see what a mess I am."