guilty pleasure [bieber]

chapter 4

NAOMI:

Me: Please stop avoiding me. I'm sorry about Monday, but I hope that you can forgive me so that we can talk.

Pressing 'Send' I wait

I peer up from behind my desk to see if Justin would reply back. It was a rare occasion, but his blinds were open so I knew that he had read it. He'd been screening every text I'd sent him for the past two days, but getting a reply was proving to be the toughest part.

He reads it and shakes his head. I roll my eyes and sigh. I'd said one stupid thing. One! Something I regret and this was how he treated me and yet every time he's done and said things he probably didn't mean he'd bat his eyelashes and ended up right back in my bed.

Me: I wish you'd stop screening my text. I can see you from my desk.

And for the third time today, I peer back over my desk. He checks it and this time he actually types something. For a minute I'm overcome with joy. I hear that familiar ding and slide the screen to check the text:

Justin: DO YOUR WORK.

I frown and place the phone on my desk. I could full out cry as tears prick. Why was he doing this? I rub my temple in frustration knowing that if my sister caught wind of how I was acting she'd have some choice of words for me. Where was my integrity?

I glance once more at Justin in his office before mentally agreeing that a lunch break would do me some good.

I grab my things and head downstairs.

I sit in the cafe on the first floor of Justin's building picking at my food with a fork. I couldn't eat. I was too fixated on Justin to even think about eating and as for sleeping I hadn't been doing much of that these past few nights either.

The dreams wouldn't subside long enough to let me. They were all about him. What I really needed was someone that I could talk to. That someone being my mom. I missed her. Having my own life left no time to hardly ever have a five minute phone call with her.

As I pull myself from my own thoughts I realize the chatter in the cafe had began to die down. I check my phone and it's fifteen after one. I trash the food I didn't eat and rush back to the top floor. When I exit the elevator I scurry back to my desk before Justin notices I'm late.

No matter how much we fought I never wanted him to think I would ever take this job for granted.

:::

I plop on the sofa next to my sister exasperated, wishing I could talk to her. We had the same father, but different mothers. He'd left my mom for hers and left her mom for yet another woman. It'd been some years since we found out about each other but it honestly felt like we've known one another our entire lives.

"What's wrong?" Logan questions as she shuffles around on the sofa before pulling my head into her lap beginning to caress my hair. Oh how I wish this was my mom right now, but this would have to suffice. "Nothing's wrong." I tell her, unable to convince both myself and her. It was just hard to sound convincing or put up a facade like I was alright when my heart felt shattered.

"Problems with a certain magazine mogul?" I look up at her, she smiles and I give her a lopsided smile back.

"Well it's none of my business and it's definitely not my place to say, but I know what's going on between you two and anyone with half a mind probably does too. So whatever's going on between you two right now at this moment–it may be is for the best."