Flawless

Part 9

A month and half has gone by and so far I've been able to stay clear from all drugs. It's been hard though. Without the drugs, I'm left to deal with my own demons alone in this apartment. As the days went on, I found myself talking to myself more and more. I still haven't been able to see my baby which kills me inside. Q acts as if he's child protective services and supervises the few phone calls I get to have with Myra. It makes me happy and sad at the same time to see my baby having the time of her life at his house.

And as for the club, I got fired after the scene I caused on stage. The club was the least of my worries though. I still had a lot of money saved up to last me a while. It was later on in the day and I was in what use to be Elise's room. I sat drawing different outfits. I smiled at my work. Elise would love the outfits I sketched out. I know I haven't made the best decisions since her passing but I still planned on doing at least one thing that would make her proud.

My thoughts were interrupted when I heard a knock at the door. I slowly got up and made my way to the front door. Once I opened, I seen those hazel eyes staring at me. "Mommy I've missed you" I heard a small voice say.

Tears filled my eyes as I looked down to see my bundle of joy smiling at me. "Mommy's missed you too" I said while picking her up and kissing all over her chubby face.

"Why you crying mommy" she asked while placing her hand on my cheek.

"These are tears of joy" I whispered as I walked us into the living room. Q didn't bother to say a word to me but instead just sat quietly on the couch and watched me and Myra interact.

As the day went on I spent my time chasing Myra around and playing hiding n seek. That was Myra's favorite game. I found it funny how she would always hide in the same place which was under the table. But I would pretend to not see her just to make a smile appear on her face. Having this time with her made me realize how stupid and selfish I was. I let her down during a time she needed me the most and I'll always regret that.

*************

"Mommy can we watch a movie now" she asked with excitement. Nighttime was approaching and neither me or her wanted the fun to end.

"What do you want to watch baby" I asked.

"Hmmm let's watch...Moana" she said.

"Alright you go tell Quinnel to turn it on for us while I go grab some snacks for us to eat" I said while searching through the kitchen for something we could snack on.

"Otay....Daddy, mommy said we can watch a movie" she yelled running into the room.

I literally froze. Did she just call him daddy? I always knew she wanted a father figure in her life. Whenever we were around other kids that had both parents she would ask where is her daddy. Myra has always been very smart for her age so lying wasn't really a option. Of course I broke it down to her in a nice way that a child her age could kind of understand but it was hard. I just worry that Q may not alway be here. Who knows he might have children of his own and leave. Then I'll be left to pick of the pieces. The last thing I want is for Myra to go through that.

"Are you coming mommy" I heard Myra yell from the living room, snapping me out of my thoughts.

Just enjoy this moment, I tried telling myself. Don't worry about the future for right now, just focus on the present I repeated in my head as I made my way over to the couch.
Q was now sitting closer to us. We truly look like a normal family having a movie night.
***************

We were a little over an hour into the movie and Myra was knocked out on my chest. I no longer was watching the movie but instead focused on my child as I rubbed my hand through her curls. Taking in the moment, I caught a glance of Q staring at me. This entire time it's like he's been studying my every move.

"Are you searching for a issue cause you've been watching me like a hawk this entire day." I said out loud.

"I'm just observing how you moving to make sure Myra is in good hands" he said.

"Good hands" I said pausing for a second.

"Don't act as if my child hasn't been in my hands for most of her life. You just came in the picture. Yes I fucked up and made a huge mistake. But I'll never make another mistake like that again. So don't sit here and act like your a better parent than me. I've been here and always will be...I can't say the same for you. You got her calling you daddy but we both know you can step out at anytime" I said glaring at him.

"If I planned on stepping out, I would of never step in the situation in the first place. I love Myra so from here on out you and her are my business. So I got to make sure your head right after the shit you pulled. " he said.

Instead of saying anything else I went to go lay Myra down in Elise's room. The last thing I wanted was her to wake up and be reminded of my mistake. Once I laid her down, I quietly walked out the room while shutting the door behind me. I didn't bother to even go back in the living room. I could sense it was bad vibes between me and Q due to him holding this mistake over my head. Sure it didn't happen that long ago but over the past month and some change I've made some progress.

I walked into my room and started stripping to go take a shower. While in my shower, I thought about everything I needed to do in order to set a better example for my daughter. After my 20 minute shower, I wrapped my towel around my body and walked back in my room. Just before I was about to drop my towel, I saw Q sitting on the edge of my bed.

"Can you get out so that I can get dressed" I said.

"You can strip in front of a room of randoms but not in front of me. Trust me I seen most of it before." He said.

"You know just cause I was stripping doesn't mean I like to show off my body outside of the fucking job. You think I wanted to be a damn stripper. I fell on hard times and at least I don't go around killing people for a living and selling dope to pregnant ladies" I said with bass in my voice while dropping my towel when I was finished.

I walked over to my dresser, completely annoyed. As I started getting out a pair of underwear to wear, I felt a presence behind me. I quickly turned around to see Q standing over me. He picked me up and placed me on top of the dresser.

"Look don't go speaking about business you don't know about. Trust me the people I kill are ones you wouldn't want walking around. And I make sure none of my product is sold to any pregnant junkie. So drop the fucking attitude. I didn't mean for it to come out that way but just know from here on out all that stripping shit is cancelled . Only nigga seeing this body is me" he said staring into my soul.

Stuck in a daze, I had completely forgot I was even naked until I felt a cool breeze on my body once he stepped away, taking all of his body heat with him.

Did Q just claim her or what. This chapter was something slight but there's more interesting details to come. Leave comments .