Just Friends

Seven

I stared out the window of the vehicle we were travelling in. Such a beautiful city but our daily shoot did not allow for us to see a lot of color. I love my job but there are moments when I miss being at home in Seoul. Today was one of them.

It was late at home when I called and I immediately knew something was up. I purposely did not call early because I knew she was having dinner with her friends and I respected her time with them. But as soon as she picked up, I knew something was off. "Hello, Ye Jin-ssi! How was dinner with your friends?"

"Good, good."

I frowned. She usually rambled on about the topics they discussed, only stopping to say, "Oh I can't say much more than that. Girl talk." But today there was none of that.

"What did you guys eat?"

"Ummm... There was some pasta, some sweet desserts... I forget the rest."

"Did you have fun?"

"Yes."

I exhaled. "Jin, is everything alright?"

She was quiet for a long time, so much so that I had to check if the line had been disconnected.

"Jin? Jin? Just let me know if you don't want to talk. I can call another time."

"No, no. I... I was just thinking about something Hyo Jin said." She paused again and I waited for her to continue. I could hear the anxiety in her voice when she finally said, "She was asking what's really between us."

She went on to explain that Hyo Jin had overheard the arrangements I was making for the new locks at my flat. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make it awkward for you. I would understand if you do not wish to do so."

"That's not it, Bin. It's okay. I want to. But..."

"But what?"

"Is it fair? I mean, I know we've talked about this but..."

I released a careful breath. It was a delicate topic and I truly disliked having to discuss it over the phone, however, I worried that if I delayed this I may end up regretting it. "Jin-ssi, like you said, we've discussed this. You and I agreed so it is not unfair on my part. If you are changing your mind, I would appreciate it very much if we could discuss face-to-face when I get back. My situation right now is not ideal and I wish you wouldn't turn back on me while I am away with no chance to fix this."

Okay, I hope I didn't sound too desperate but I also wanted to communicate to her how much this was important to me. This —- whatever "this" is.

"I'm sorry, Bin-ssi. I don't mean to cause trouble."

"You're not... but you ARE making me worry."

She sighed. "I'm sorry. Don't worry. We're good. But yes, talk when you get back."

We ended the call so she could rest, but part of me remained unsettled. I recalled to the day we first discussed our situation. It was after I visited her and spent her birthday in LA with her.

"Thank you, Bin-ssi! I am immensely happy. Thank you!" She said, giving me a tight hug and when she pulled back, I looked at her beaming face and my heart swelled.

I had known for a while but at that moment I was certain, I wanted a future with her.

And as I bent my head, I was glad that she tiptoed and we shared our very first kiss.

A few weeks later, photos of our trip was on the media and our agencies were frantically calling us. As we sat on the couch , with Ye Jin's head on my lap, I asked, "What do you want to do, Jin-ssi?"

She frowned. "What do you want to do?" She asked back.

"I don't mind telling the media that we are seeing each other. I mean... we are, aren't we?"

She smiled. "Yes... I just... worry about the intrusion. It's going to be twice as difficult if we confirm anything."

I nodded, understanding her point because that had been my experience in the past. "I agree. But I worry how you would feel if we deny? I don't want you to feel like I am not respecting this."

Ye Jin sat up and smiled. "Thank you, but no... I won't mind. Besides, I think I would like to get to know you better without having our every move played out in the media."

I nodded, but then a thought occurred to me. "So, we're not yet together, I guess?"

She looked down. "I... I'm sorry, Bin. I'm not sure yet. I like being around you but I also know how fragile these things are in our industry. I just need more time to see if you're one of those who stay."

It wasn't the outcome I wanted but I appreciated that she was straightforward about it instead of giving me those long-winded speeches that never really settled anything. "I understand. So, we are... close friends?"

"Yes. Very close friends."

I smiled. "Just so I know how this works, close friends can hang out and go to eat often, right?"

"Yes. And go on trips and do activities together... like swimming or golf."

"Good. I like that a lot," I said. "But I'm guessing friends don't kiss."

She blushed but then pouted. "I guess not. I would like to continue hugging if that is alright."

I pinched her cheeks because I could not stand her cuteness. "If you are comfortable with that then yes, I would like that as well." I looked at her and then thought about something, "And dating other people? Where do we stand on that?"

I saw her shoulders sag. "I would not want that, but I will not demand it. I would be unfair for me to ask."

"I don't plan on seeing other people."

Her head shot up. "Bin-ssi, isn't that unfair to you?"

"Why? It's my life, my decision. Why is it unfair?" I looked at her and then nervously asked, "And you? Can I at least know?"

"I don't plan on seeing other people," she echoed. "I want to beat only you in golf."

I let out a loud laugh.

"Please be patient with me, Bin."

"Of course," opening my arms so she can settle in, I stroked her hair before I continued. "It may be tough, but I hope you know that not everyone leaves, Jin-ssi. Some people stay."

She was quiet for a long time that I thought she had fallen asleep. After a few minutes, she said, "And would some people be okay with waiting?"

I smiled. "For you? Definitely."