The 5th member~QUEEN *ON HOLD*

1963-"We'll get through this together."

September 1st, 1963
Yesterday, Roger and I got in a fight.

We've gotten in many fights over the years but this one was different. I don't even know why we started arguing, but it happened and now he refuses to go to my birthday party.

Right now, I'm sort of helping my mum and sisters out with the party decorations. Raphael went with my papa to get some ice cream to go with the cake.

After decorations were done, people started to arrive. Nancy, Les, Nick Penrose, Mike Dudley, James Francis, Betty Frank, and Sally Ronalds have already shown up.

I try to have fun, but it just doesn't seem right without Roger. I mean, Clare, Michael and Winnie even showed up.

Oh another person who hasn't shown up was papa. They should have been back by now. Mum assured me that they will be back but I can see in her eyes that she is getting a bit nervous.

The party goes on, we play games, we have lunch, we eat cake(without ice cream), we open presents, and now it's time for everyone to go home.

I thank everyone for coming, just like my mum told me to do.

The only people who are left, are my sisters, my mum, and the Taylors, well besides Roger.

I slump on the couch and rub my temples. I sigh as I finally get some peace and quiet. That was until the phone rang and my mother raced to answer it.

"Bonjour?............This is she............Oh no, are they ok?............."Whatever the person on the other end said, broke my mum. She started crying and mumbling a prayer.

Winfred went up to comfort her and see what had happened. My mum just cried. I'm not sure what she's crying about but I have a feeling it's bad.

I look at Clare, who's with Natalie and Adeline. They all looked worried.

"My baby..."My mum's heart wrenching sobs echo throughout the house.

"Shhhhhhhh, Claude it's going to be ok." Winfred holds her in her arms.

"Cher Seigneur, je prie pour ceux qui sont malades, souffrants et physiquement mal à l'aise. Nos corps peuvent être si fragiles et lorsqu'ils sont attaqués physiquement, des difficultés et des peurs surgissent. Je prie pour quiconque est malade en ce moment et calme la guérison au nom de Jésus. Aidez les maris et les femmes à se réunir et à prendre soin les uns des autres et des membres de leur famille. Ne laissez pas l'irritation de la maladie éloigner les gens les uns des autres. Au lieu de cela, rapprochez-les et rapprochez-les de Toi au nom de Jésus, Amen." She said a prayer in French.

That prayer is specifically asking god to help people in need. My stomach dropped.

"Claudette, you have to calm down and tell me what's happening." Winfred said in a hush tone.

"Jules and-and Raphael. They got into a car crash." Mum said

Mu heart dropped. If they died I could never forgive myself. I asked for the ice cream. It's my fault they went out.

I said a little prayer of my own.

The next hour felt like a few minutes.

Winfred immediately rushed me, my mum and my sisters into the car. She stopped to talk to Michael, but then got into the car and rushed to the hospital.

Once we were there, a nurse told us to wait as she got us their doctor.

The doctor walked in and he had a...sympathetic expression written all over his face.

"Ma'am I'm so sorry, but your son was gone before we could do anything about. Your husband as well." The doctor said

I felt like the world was crumbling down right in front of me. My papa and brother. Dead.

It's my fault. All my fault. I couldn't hear anything else after that. I couldn't hear my mother's sobs, my sisters cries, Winfred's choked up voice trying to calm down my mum, my sisters, and me while also trying to hold back her own tears.

Soon we were seeing their bodies. Their lifeless, pale bodies.

Papa looked as handsome as he always does, or did. His skin was pale as the moon and I couldn't see his amazing chocolate brown eyes anymore. Not like I wanted to. They wouldn't be joyful. Not anymore.

Next was Raphael. I couldn't look at him. The first thing I saw was a scar, then a bruise and then a huge scar. I didn't want to remember my brother like that. So I looked away.

Next thing I know, we are on our way home. Without  my brother or my father to accompany us. The only sounds that could be heard were the sobs coming from everyone's mouth.

Once we got home, I immediately went straight to my room. I didn't want to see ANYTHING that reminded me of them. Which is why I flipped over every picture I had with them in my room.

I sat on my bed looking at the ceiling thinking this was the worst birthday ever. My papa died. My brother died. And it was all my fault. I don't think I'll  ever be able to forgive myself.

I thought back to the times when my papa helped me, when he made me laugh, cry, happy. He always made me happy.

I let out a sob. I'll never be able to make more memories with him. With both of them.

I hear a pebble hit my window and I don't bother to get up.

Roger steps into my room and immediately goes to hug me.

I break down in his arms.

"Shhhhh, I know, I know."

"Their gone." I said in between sobs.

"But their not forgotten. Their right here. In your heart. You also have amazing memories of them. We'll get through this together."

"It was my fault."

"Jackie you can't blame yourself. Of course it's not your fault. It's that arse who hit them."

After a while I calmed down, actually it was more like I ran out of tears. I stayed in his arms for that night, and every other night until their funeral.

The day of their funeral was...sad. I cried. A lot. My mum hasn't acted the same since my birthday, which was 14 days ago. My sisters just stay quiet. I, well, I've taken a dark path. I haven't cried for a while. I cried the day of and after they died. Then I cried today, but that's it. I've heard my mum cry every single day and every single night.

It's not the same without them. Roger assures me that's it's going to get better, but I don't think it will. How could it? I lost 2 people who meant dearly to me.

𝓦𝓸𝓻𝓭 𝓬𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓽 1131
Hello, sorry this was a bad chapter, I'm a little sick and had a horrible night, but I promise, I have plans for the upcoming chapters. Hope you like it. Bye loves.

;)

Paige

Bonjour=Hello
(I'm not going to translate the prayer because I don't know exactly what it says. I asked my cousin who lives in France for a prayer and she sent this one.)