want you back. [𝚍𝚓𝚜]

s͓̽e͓̽v͓̽e͓̽n͓̽. f͓̽i͓̽x͓̽ u͓̽s͓̽

"you said you cared and you missed me too... and i'm well aware i write too many songs about you"
falling - harry styles
☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎ ☂︎

✯ january 29th, 2020 ✯

out of all the things eleanor thought she'd be doing today, meeting up with her ex boyfriend was not one of them. she thought of canceling, she really did, but she decided against it- momma ain't raise no bitch.

she took a deep breathe and pulled open the door to the pizza place they'd decided to meet at. her eyes scanned the room and her heart clenched when they landed on daniel. he was sat in a booth by one of the windows and he looked just as (if not more) nervous then her.

she walked up to him timidly and the pit in her stomach continued to grow as she grew closer to the table. he noticed her immediately and stood to meet her when she was close enough

"h-hey" he stuttered, "thank you for meeting with me.. i, uh, i really appreciate it." she nodded at him and sent him a tight smile. the two stood there awkwardly for a moment before daniel cleared his throat and motioned to the seat across from him, "we can, uh, we can sit"

"why'd you wanna meet?" she asked him. natalia had told her the best thing to do was get straight to the point and she'd decided to follow the girls advice.

"i just.. i wanted to talk to you"

"about what?"

"about us" he answered

she ran her hand through her hair nervously. she didn't know why his answer surprised her, she'd assumed that's why he'd asked her to meet.. but hearing him confirm it caused even more nerves to coarse through her

"what about us?" she asked, "there is no us"

"i-i know" he sighed, "lennie, i regret what i did every single day"

"good. you should."

"i don't deserve your forgiveness" he told her, "but i'd do anything to get it."

the waitress approached the table, stopping ellie from answering him. she flashed the two a wide smile, "what can i get the two of you?"

"i'll just have a water" eleanor smiled politely. secretly, she was thankful the waitress had chosen to take their order when she had. she wasn't really sure how to answer daniel.. she wasn't sure how to tell him that she didn't know if there was anything he could do that would earn her forgiveness.

"me too" daniel told the waitress, "and a small barbecue chicken pizza..."- he looked at ellie and raised an eyebrow, silently asking if she was okay with that.

she nodded at the waitress in agreement and the worker sent the two of them another smile, "you two make a cute couple!" she told them cheerfully.

ellie felt her cheeks heat up while daniel cleared his throat awkwardly, "thanks but, uh, we're not together" he informed the girl

"quite the opposite actually" ellie added

the waitress merely shrugged at them, "oh, well, maybe you should work on that" she told them before turning and walking away

maybe you should work on minding your business, eleanor thought to herself bitterly. the two of them sat in silence and ellie tried her best to looking anywhere except at daniel. she wasn't as nervous anymore, but she just felt awkward and overwhelmed.

"do.. do you still love me? do you miss us?" daniel blurted, breaking the silence the two had fallen into.

eleanors eyes widened and she found herself stuttering, too taken off guard to put together an answer

"i-i'm sorry" daniel gushed, "i shouldn't of... i shouldn't of asked you that, i'm sorry" mentally, he was cursing himself. what a way to make her uncomfortable, daniel. great job.

"no, uh, it's okay" she muttered. they fell into another silence after that and so she sat and pondered her options. she could lie, tell him she was completely over him and that not a single part of her still had feelings for him. or, she could just be honest and tell him that, although she really wished she wasn't, she was still in love with him and she did miss him. she sighed and just decided to go with the latter. "yeah, i do"

"you do what?"

"miss us...and still love you"

daniels face brightened considerably and he felt waves of a new found hope crash into him. eleanor felt her heart clench knowing she was about to rip the rug from beneath him

"but that doesn't change anything" she told him sternly. her heart screamed at her, telling her that wasn't true, that her confession of her feelings changed everything, but she refused to listen to it. she refused to get her heartbroken again.

"lennie, that changes everything" he told her softly, "i-i know i screwed up in the past, but i'll never do that. not again. i've changed, i swear"

she shook her head at him, "i've changed too, daniel. i'm not the same girl that i was a year ago"

"i know" he sighed, "and i'm to blame for that, but let me fix it. let me fix you"

"fix me?" she scoffed at him, "there's nothing wrong with me."

"t-that's not what i meant" he stammered, "lennie, wait, where are you going? don't leave!"

all she did was look at him and glare, rushing to gather her things. she couldn't stand to be around him anymore- she needed to leave. she needed to think.

"it was nice meeting with you" she told him, "but i've gotta go."

"ellie, i didn't mean to offend you. please don't leave" he begged

"i'll see you around, daniel." and with that, she turned on her heel and practically ran out of the restaurant. this was the third time she had ran from him... you'd think she'd remember to take her heart with her.