Lucifer (The Devil Chronicles #1)

Chapter 24

"C'mon Charlie, focus," Gabriel scolded. I was sweating from concentrating so hard. "Focus on your breathing. The power is a part of you." I breathed deeply in, shutting my eyes. I listened closely to my blood, waiting to hear something, anything.

"Gabriel, I can't!" I fumed, standing up abruptly.

"You've done it before, you can do it again," Gabriel growled at me. I sneered back at him and crossed my arms. He was acting like an asshole, something I've realized that many agree he actually is. Luke definitely doesn't like him.

"Give her a break, Gabe," Michael said from the corner where he watched. Lucifer fought to watch also but lost that battle. God explained that Luke didn't want to see me hurt, which didn't make sense because Luke didn't care about me. He must have been worried about my power.

"We don't know when he's coming back. I don't know how much time we have," Gabriel argued with Michael.

"Pushing her power and straining it will help nothing. Charlie, sit," Michael commanded. I obeyed and he sat beside me as Gabriel paced back and forth.

Michael grabbed my hands and faced me. "Close your eyes. Count your breaths. Think of everything that makes you happy. Think of energy."

I nodded and breathed in slowly. Closing my eyes again, thought about Pat and the way he used to buy me ice cream every Wednesday. I thought of my mother's laugh. And... I thought of Luke and how we would read in my hospital bed. I thought of how much I wanted him to kiss me. And I felt it, a low humming that resonated deep in my gut.

"What do I do with it," I gasped out.

"Pretend like it's string, and you're gently coiling it up," Michael said, squeezing my hands. I did as he instructed and gently wound the energy. I somehow managed to store it in my lower chest, where I knew I could use it.

"I did it," I said, laughing, "I actually did it." I opened my eyes and hugged Michael tightly. I saw Gabriel hiding a smile.

"Now," Gabriel said, "you're gonna have to learn how to use it as a weapon."

***

"Hey," I heard Luke say from the doorway.  I looked up from my book and smiled at him. "We should talk," he finished, sitting in the chair next to my bed.

My stomach went sour. "Uh, okay," I responded, "what's up?"

He sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. "I know I've been weird lately. I just... Look, Charlie, we can't do this," he finished, not making eye contact.

I felt like I had just been punched in the stomach. I knew he was right. We both did. He had a child, he had a soulmate. "You're right," I responded, "Tommy needs you," I stand up and walk past him but he grabs my arm.

"Stop, please," he says, looking up at me. I do. "I have to explain why, and it's not because of Tommy. Tommy and Kate are better off without me and so are you."

I sit back down on the bed. "What do you mean?" I ask, searching his face. Anguish. All I see is anguish. "Luke, what do you mean?"

He sighs, a tear falling down his cheek. "It's my fault. This. You. It's all my fault. You'd be in heaven, an angel. I can't take away eternal happiness from you, I just can't," Luke says, his head in his hands. I see him begin to shake.

"Luke, no," I say, moving to the floor on my knees in front of him. I move his hands away. "Look at me," I whisper, and when he doesn't, I gently grab his face in my hands, "None of this is your fault. I made the decision to go with you. I did. I have a power that Macayah wants and that's why he took me. This is not you, none of it is you," I insist, tears filling my eyes.

Luke's face is hopeless. "I will not be your Hades. You are not my Persephone and I will not take your light away," he whispered, gently touching my cheek. Then, he stood up, and walked out. I stayed on my knees on the floor, crying for the boy that couldn't see just how much he meant to me.

***

I paced around outside the office, unsure of where to go. There was going to be a battle soon, I knew that, but I couldn't be anywhere near Charlie.

"What's going on, Lucifer? Is something wrong? Where's Charlie?" Michael fretted, coming up behind me.

I leaned against the wall of the hallway, sliding down to the floor. "She's fine. Well," I continued, "as fine as she can be, I suppose."

Michael looked me up and down, sighed, and sat down next to me. We sat there for a little while, Michael looking at me expectantly. "Come on, Lucifer, talk," Michael persisted, nudging my shoulder.

I sighed and leaned my head against the wall. "I can't take her with me to hell, Michael. I can't take her happiness. It's the same reason that Kate and I broke up. Kate and Tommy and Charlie can't come to fucking hell with me and stay there. It's not right. It's my fault any of them are involved in this shit anyway." Michael sighed and hit me on the back of the head. I stood up. "Ow! What the hell?"

Michael stood up as well. "Lucifer, you're an idiot! Sure, Kate decided it was better to leave. But have you even asked Charlie what she wants to do? You're acting like you stole her and are holding her in a cell! Charlie isn't you, she can leave!" Michael argued. He sighed and put his hands on his hips. "Look, Heaven isn't all it's cracked up to be. The heaven up there is the heaven that you, individually choose to make it."

I shake my head, confused, "so?"

"So, you dumbass, what if her heaven is with you?" Michael finished.

My jaw drops. He can't be right. Can he? "Okay, but she wouldn't even be in this situation if it weren't for me," I argued right back.

"Lucifer, she had cancer and powers. Of course she would be in this situation without you. She'd be both dead and in danger either way. If anything, you made this situation better because you're in love with her. You helped her save you," Michael smiled at me.

He was right. I turned around and ran back to Charlie's room, to find her still crying on the floor. She looked up at me, her beautiful green eyes full of tears. My heart overfilled with love. I sank to the floor in front of her, pulled her to me, and kissed her.