Silver Lining

33. Dark times

27 days after

Today was a pyjama day.

Well technically, I wasn't wearing pyjamas, but I wasn't wearing proper clothes that you could wear out either. I was wearing a size twenty four jumper. Which is huge, because I'm a size eight. But it was comfy, and because the jumper was a size twenty four, I could get away with not wearing pants. Since Theo wasn't home, and it was just me and Asher, I felt like I should have a no pants day. You have to have a no pants day every once in a while, right?

I made pancakes, and then ate them on the couch and watched Adventure Time. I don't know what age group the show is aimed at, but I watch it all the time. And I even sung the theme tune as loud and as badly as I could.
I smiled to myself. This was going to be a great day.

After the Adventure Time marathon, I made a blanket fort, and then sat in it and scrolled through Instagram. I logged out of my main account, and went on my private one. Most YouTubers I know have a private account that the public doesn't know about, and we only let friends follow us on it. Sometimes, you just want to get away from the fame and the millions of followers. Sometimes, you just feel like being a normal person with a normal life. I scrolled through my newsfeed, and then posted a selfie of Asher and I. The first like was a whole ten minutes after I posted it, which actually was the best feeling. Because notifications flood after I post something usually. "Living the normal life," I said to Asher, who licked my face happily. "Ew doggy, no kissies." I kissed his head, burying my face into his shaggy fluff. "Hah, kissed you! Guess I'm a hypocrite." Asher licked my cheek again. "Grrrrrrr," I growled at him. He growled back, stretching out with his bum in the air and his tail wagging ninety miles an hour.

I made myself some toast for lunch, then sliced tomatoes, put them on the toast, and covered it with salt and pepper. And a can of coke. Asher looked at me, wagging his tail. "Do you want food, bub? Okay, wait a sec." I put down the plate and can of coke on the bench, and then put a bit of dry food in Asher's bowl. He looked unimpressed. "If you have meat everyday, you'll get chubby," I told him, and Asher still looked at me. "Well eat it or don't eat it. I'm going to watch another Adventure Time, so you should come with if you want to watch." Asher filled up his mouth with food pebbles, and then walked with me to the living room without swallowing them, and then spat them out on the carpet. He likes to sit on the carpet and eat them one at a time. Princess dog.

It was once it got dark that I wished I wasn't alone. Theo was at a conference in Sydney for today and tomorrow, and he'd get home around lunchtime. Which was good, because tomorrow was New Years Eve, and I didn't want to spend it alone. Well, I could of quite easily spent it with Laurel and Matt if Theo was away for the whole day, but what I meant was that I didn't want to spend it without Theo.

I really wished Theo was here. I think I saw the silhouette person on our balcony, but that's ridiculous because we live on the fifth floor, no one could get up there. Even so, I was freaking out.

I read a magazine on the couch to try take my mind off it, but I couldn't concentrate on the magazine. Ever since I had been back, I was so paranoid.

I heard a loud crash, and even though it was probably outside, I screamed and jumped a mile. Asher barked once, and then the power went out.
Shit.
I looked out the window, and I couldn't see a single light. It was the whole city.

The only torch I had was on my phone, so I used that until I had found some candles and a lighter. I was so scared I was crying, and I tried to tell myself I was just being silly and paranoid, but I still felt like something bad would happen.

"Maybe if I had a drink, that would make me less anxious," I mumbled to myself, and got a bottle of vodka out of the fridge, and poured a small bit into a glass.
I don't know what I was thinking, I hate the taste of vodka, but I thought it might calm me.

Something heavy dropped in the apartment above making a loud noise, and I screamed.

My breathing was getting faster, and I felt like I was choking. Maybe this was it, maybe this was where I would die.
At least Michael wouldn't be able to get me if I was dead.

I picked up the bottle of vodka, and sipped it straight from the bottle. My heart was racing, and I was crying uncontrollably. I felt so light headed and dizzy, and I was swaying.
Would I faint? Can you faint if it's not real? Is it real?

I swayed and stumbled into the bench. My arms shot out to catch myself, and I knocked over a glass bottle, and it shattered. Asher was barking, but it sounded fifty times louder than it should.

I think the floor came at me as I fell, but that bit might not be real. I can't remember what was real and what wasn't. The smashed glass from the bottle bit into my arms and legs, and I saw a flash of deep red blood in the flickering candlelight. My vision seemed to be in flashes, an image of reality followed by darkness or loud bright swirls of colour. Was the colour real or something made up?

Drowning.
I couldn't breathe.
My lungs were fighting to be the scariest, but so was my heart. It was going into overdrive.

I was still lying on the glass, and I had started to shake so much that I was making millions of tiny cuts on my arms and legs.

A flash of darkness.

I saw the flash of a clock. It was one am.

I had somehow gone from lying on the floor, to standing at the bench. I gripped onto the bench, the room spinning. I picked up the bottle of vodka, and took a large gulp, the fiery liquid burning my throat. I don't handle alcohol very well.

All off a sudden the fear got worse, more real. My vision became crystal clear, sharp, almost fake. Was it fake?

Maybe I was going crazy. There was no way this could happen, and I wasn't going crazy.
Or maybe it was a dream.
Or maybe my whole life was a dream, and I'd wake up as a baby any minute now.
I pinched my arm, wondering if I'd wake up.
No such luck, I was still here.

There was a loud noise that sounded like the door opening. Was there someone in the apartment? I grabbed a big knife out of the knife holder, and edged along the walls towards the hallway so that I could see the door at the end.

A huge wave of dizziness came over me, and I momentarily why I was holding such a big knife when I was in this state. "To protect yourself with," I told myself, and forgot all about the worry.

***

A young man got off the train, amongst the crowd. It didn't matter what time it was, train stations in Melbourne were always busy. The young man walked faster than the other people, for he had somewhere to be.

He walked quickly to his apartment building, excited to see his girlfriend after a two day meeting in Sydney. He usually toook the stair as extra excercise, but his suitcase was heavy so he took the elevator.

The young man stood outside the door to the apartment and smiled to himself. He knocked on the door, and waited for his girlfriend to answer. She didn't, and he knocked again.
Confused, he tried to remember if she had said anything about being out, but he didn't think she did.

He pulled his key out of the satchel bag he had over his shoulder, and unlocked the door. "Madison?" He called out his girlfriends name. There was no answer, and he put his bags on the floor in the hall. A small Bichon Frise puppy ran towards the young man, and barked. "Asher! Don't bark," he said, and bent down to pat the puppy, and stopped. Was that blood in the puppy's fur? "Are you hurt, Asher?" The young man asked the puppy, and the puppy barked again. He didn't tell the puppy off for barking this time, but began to run through the apartment, looking for his girlfriend.

He found her on the floor in the kitchen. She was lying on top of smashed glass, and there was an empty vodka bottle on the floor next to her. Dried blood was on her jumper. She wasn't wearing any pants, and her legs were covered in cuts and dried blood. A shard of glass is sticking out of her wrist. As the young man reaches for his phone to call an ambulance, the sunlight reflects off a ring on the girls finger.

*****
Authors note:
Only one chapter to go! What do you think will happen in it?
Thank you all so much for all the reads and votes <3
Ella xx