I'll never say

He's gone

Tom woke with a  horrible feeling deep in his chest. Everything felt wrong, he felt wrong. This was nothing like those movies, or like the nights before it all when he'd wake with a muddy head, the previous night unbeknownst to him. No, he knew. The moment he became conscious, he knew. He could remember the cold, hard floor, watching the man walking around Tord through the screen. The look of fear on Tord's face slowly morphing into calm understanding, acceptance, his voice as he gave his final goodbyes, those would never ever leave his head. 

Tom was scared to open his eyes. What if everyone was dead? What if he was forced to face his dead lovers, knowing there wasn't a damn thing he could've done to save them? What if- Tom took a deep breath. It didn't smell like blood. He continued to breathe, taking in his surroundings. 

He was on a bed, a soft comfortable one. The room he was in smelled of smurnoff and lavender air freshener. But… No… there's no way… sitting up, tom reached to his left, keeping his eyes firmly shut. His hand brushed up against the cool neck of his beloved bass, and he knew. Somehow, he was back in his apartment. Opening his eyes, he only confirmed this. 

"No no no, how?" He whispered, standing up on weak legs. God, they felt like jelly! Still, he pushed on, using the wall as he looked around his apartment, which felt so much smaller. He finally stumbled into the kitchen after clearing the place, and finding no other human beside himself. Sitting on his island  was a neatly written note.

Dear Thomas Rosewell

We can't express how sorry we are for all the trauma we've caused. We never meant for things to get so out of hand, and you definitely were never meant to be dragged into things. We hope to one day make amends

Tay & Kai

Tom dropped the note, his palm digging into the marble as a way to ground himself. Tord was... He whimpered as horrible flashbacks invaded his mind. He was dead, wasn't he? Tom jumped, whipping around as fear flooded his system as his front door crashed open. Luckily, the only people rushing in were Edd and Matt, looking frantic and tired respectively.

"Tom!" Matt quickly pulled the shorter male into a hug, his voice soft and breathy. Edd was clinging to Matt's other arm, eyes darting around. "Is Tord here?" 

His eyes held a deep sorrow, and he must've known the answer already. "No… I've checked." Edd slowly sank to the floor, tears dripping down his face as he let out a choked off sob.

"No! He can't…" Tom dropped down to the floor, Matt next to him as he scoped up edd in his arms. He looked to his freckled boyfriend for an explanation.

"Tord's he's not.. He's not here. We look through our apartments and he's not here." Maty said softly, tears of his own welling up in his tired blue eyes. 

"No no no! He's not dead, he can't be.." Edd whined. Tom frowned, running his fingers through Edd's dirty hair. 

"I'm so sorry, edd, I'm sorry."  He mumbled, closing his eyes tightly.

"No, no he isn't dead. He'll come back, right? Tord won't leave us again, I'm a good boyfriend, right?"

"Of course he loves us, edd. He did all that for us, you're a wonderful boyfriend.." Tom soothed. Edd  whimpered, clutching his hoodie tightly.

"So he'll come back?" Tom bit his lip, unable to respond in a way that would make Edd happy. How was he supposed to respond? Thankfully, Matt found a way to respond in a way that Tom couldn't.

"I don't know Eddie, but I'm sure if he's okay he'll come to us as soon as possible. He just needs some time to heal." He said, tears spilling down his face. Edd nodded, leaning against Tom's chest with a tired, loopy smile.