6/13/19
Well. Here I am again. He left. Again. But now I'm his wife. As soon as the busses were out of sight, I felt that familiar emptiness. The kind that settles in your stomach and makes you sick. I was fine though. I wasn't going to cry.
The car rides after he leaves are the WORST. I always break down in the car. It never fails. Luckily this time only a few soundless tears escaped. A few minutes after I got to our home on base, I took a "nap". At least, that's what I'm calling it. In reality I just laid there and cried my eyes out. I hate how bad it hurts. It makes me feel weak. Him on the other hand, he seemed completely fine. Sure, I acted tough in front of him too but that's all it was. An act. I've always wondered if he has ever cried over me before. I doubt it. Was he even sad today? It was so hard to tell. Even so, I know that Nick loves me. I just know.
6/14/19
Today sucked. Not any worse than yesterday. I cried a lot. That's really all I did to be honest. I took my mom back to the airport, drive back, now here I am. Crying. Nick texted me that he landed. (Can't day where.) Its a layover so he still has 17 hours to go. He seems happy. I'm glad that he's happy. He deserves it. At least one of us is.
