Yoongi never thought that opening up to you about his struggles would do anything but hurt you and make you worry about him. He kept to himself if he could help it and dealt with it the way he knew. Everything he told you though, you made it better.
You didn't pity him and comforted him passively with empty words that made no difference, those that make others feel helpless when faced with other people's problems. Somehow, you just knew what to do about it. What was that he needed exactly and comforted him actively.
Whether it was hugging him, checking in on him, making sure he ate or slept, putting music on, sharing your own things with him or just keeping him company without having to talk at all. How did he manage to come across you? It sounded bad, but he felt happy you ruined your old laptop spilling your coffee all over it when he was there.
You sleepily rolled over next to him tangled in the bed-sheets with a wide smile plastered to your face. He laughed softly at the ridiculous but adorable sight. "Who are you? My boyfriend Yoongi doesn't wake up before me" you said dramatically with wide eyes.
He chuckled "how do you live with yourself, honestly" he muttered pursing his lips and shaking his head amused.
You sat up and pecked him "you know you love it" you said softly and he averted your gaze blushing. I love you, his thoughts betrayed him again. It hasn't even been six months since you met, he thought nervously trying to reason with himself. "So?" your words brought him back from his thoughts.
"So what?" he asked genuinely lost, narrowing his eyes. You smirked and he licked his lips bashfully, looking away once again as he realized what you meant.
"Did I stop you?" he replied as coolly as possible and you looked so smug. Yoongi had to make an effort to keep a straight face at your over-the-top display of pride. It was so funny. He closed his eyes and brought a hand to his face trying to remain unfazed.
Yoongi's way of making you feel loved was through actions more than words most of the time, so when he kept avoiding your advances, it had really affected you. You were glad he had finally opened up about what the issue was and had actually agreed to let you try to help when you needed him.
"Do you like waffles for dinner?" you changed the topic to put him out of his misery as he looked uncomfortable at your reaction. He turned to look at you with a grateful smile.
"Yes, sounds good" he nodded and you got up, walking to your closet to get some clothes and walk into the bathroom before making some. His eyes followed you until you turned to him and they shot down. You chuckled.
You'd never had a boyfriend that struggled like this though and it was going to take some time to get used to. The idea that you had to put extra effort into it was difficult though, like he wasn't as into you as you were into him.
"You sleep like this all night long, I'm just trying to get to the shower" you said and he growled as you made a fair point. It was a mystery to you that he was embarrassed about you around him but not about himself around you. "I don't mind you looking" you added hoping that would help both him and you feel better.
Yoongi looked in your eyes blushing furiously. "You do like what you see, right?" you asked self-consciously and he was frustrated he hadn't made that clear enough in the morning. He didn't know how else to tell you his low libido had nothing to do with you.
"You know I do" he tried to assure you as he reached for your hand and you sat next to him on his side of the bed.
"I want you to tell me from time to time" you said softly and looked down bashfully. He kissed your cheek and tried to think of what to tell you.
"I think"— he started but saying it was harder than he thought. Your eyes lit up expectantly and he felt bad this didn't come naturally to him —"the way you move when you walk is hot" he finished and felt mortified.
You held him tightly and his heart sank, he was not good at this and you seemed to need it more than he did. Yoongi encircled his arms around you and laid his chin on your head, worried that he wasn't doing enough to make you feel as loved as you made him feel. He was really trying, but he always fell short.
He was starting to worry about how you'd feel when he was on tour in just two months. He would make sure he sent multiple messages and pictures as he did when the comeback happened, but he was going to depend exclusively on words and he was not looking forward to it. Would that even work out? The thought made him feel uneasy.
As you showered Yoongi prepared the mix for the waffles, scrambled eggs and fried some bacon. This reminded him of their trips to USA, breakfast for dinner, was it called? You came into the kitchen just as he was setting the plates down.
"Aw, I was going to make them" you said and he walked up to you and held your hips as he lightly kissed you "I beat you to it" he answered with a smirk.
Yoongi was deep in thought as you ate. He was eating slowly and you could tell he probably wasn't hungry, something was up.
"What are you thinking about?" you asked hoping he wouldn't avoid the question.
"The world tour, it's in a couple months" he said furrowing his eyebrows as he stabbed a piece repeatedly with his fork, eyes fixed on the plate.
"We'll figure it out" you offered but it wasn't any consolation to him, what did that even mean anymore? A while back it was okay, now the date was near and you had to start thinking about it. He didn't do long distance relationships, but he would manage. At least he hoped he could.
"Will we?" he said discouraged and you placed your hand on his caressing it with your fingertips. He was going to miss those little comforting gestures of yours when he was stressed about something. It was inevitable at some point or another, even if they were mostly excited these days when they got to perform. They hardly were nervous anymore.
"Will you be okay?" he swallowed after expressing his concern. Your hand froze at his words. "You needed to see me when I was busy with the comeback" Yoongi continued.
You squeezed his hand "I know it's going to be hard, but I'll do my best, it's temporary" you tried to sound confident, but you were also worried. Nine months is a long time and you were certainly going to miss having him next to you even if he was just sleeping. Your dates were spaced out, but you didn't mind as long as you were together.
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I love this gif of Yoongi, he looks so handsome, agfsbgfd ❤ That's my useful comment, I don't say much of anything, but I had to gush over him.
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Music is My Lover
FanfictionMin Yoongi's muse is his music and his music is his one and only lover. He wasn't counting on you to walk into his life and turn his world upside down, making it more complicated than it already was. ~ Idol Yoongi x Reader Insert (no y/n) Based on m...