My Life Right Now.

From the Beginning/Me and My Dad.

So.... This. This is my short story between me and my dad. It may seem boring to you, but my story is what it is. You can see if you'd like. But it's pretty normal. If you don't like it, then you don't like me or my life, or at least that's what I'm thinking. Get it? I guess you kinda got it. Okay, good, read on!

Me and my dad have had a rough relationship since the beginning, but that's what makes things real right? I mean, we can't expect a broken world to be perfect right? So we can't expect a perfect relationship. Nothing is perfect. But when you try to do something, everything changes. When you want a good relationship you have to strive for it. This is what I'm trying to do now. I'm being for-real. So....

Me and my dad. We never really talk. We don't really have time to hang out. He's got work from Monday to Friday and sometimes he even works the weekend. I feel like it's not fair, that his job gets more attention from him than I do...... but you know what?

He's working for me and my family. He's working for me to get what I need for survival. He wants me to have the instruments and gear for my life. He's one who encourages me in everything I want to do in life.

Sometimes he doesn't say it, but he loves me. And I love him. I tell him every night, and he's saying it back more. He's not a huggy, or lovey-dovey type, but he gives me hugs. He's never been that lovey-dovey type to anyone, and I can't expect him to change just for more hugs, or for a kiss on the cheek.

I like it the way it is.

One day I was talking to him about this boy and how he was starting to put his arm around my shoulder. I told him I didn't know what to do about it, or how to react, and I wasn't sure if he would mind it or not.... my dad is a little protective. I mean he's only said a few times that he has a gun and isn't afraid to use it for his girls. But when I told him, he answered me with honesty, that he didn't mind it. As long as this kid wasn't going to try any tricks on me. Because then he would have to talk to this boy. But when I told him, I said that I just wanted him to know. And I told him I was scared to talk to him..... to which his reply was....; "If I find out you aren't talking to me, you'll get a big woopen." With a cheesy smile.

So me and my dad talk about boys. Here's another story with that:

I had just come back from Schlitterbahn and a missions trip. It was about 11:00 P.M. at the time. I told him who all was in my group. And that practically seven boys and three girls were that group, including the leaders.... and well, I hung out with a lot of guys, barely by choice.

To which his reply was;

"So you hung out with a lot a boys huh?" And not a very happy face... I couldn't reply with anything but a laugh and a nod. I mean, it's understandable. It's my protective dad.

One thing is, a lot of the guys in my grade are small and lanky.... or as I like to call them; slinky dinky's, where as I'm a buff girl..... built like my dad. I've got lots of muscle, I'm tall, and I'm a lot like him.... except for the kinda dirty jokes..... like the ones that say old stuff in it...... "So the man was riding his ... And fell on his ..." Yeah, those jokes. But he never says a bad word.

But anyways, I'm built and guys in my grade are slinky dinky's. I'm not typically socialized as "pretty" or "beautiful" but I'm me, beautiful to myself, and family, and that's all that matters. I'm weird and quirky, so I don't feel endangered when guys hang out with me.... but the problem with my dad being busy as heck.... and me hanging out with boys is..... well I tend to want attention from guys.

This happens to every girl who's father doesn't consider about the time they get with them, or who doesn't have time for hang-outs like they both want.

I for one don't go around half-clothed. I am all for modesty, because that's hotesty.

I mean, seriously. What guy would want a girl who basically reveals herself to the world? Wouldn't he want her for his own? Who wants to see that girl out on the streets?

That is why my father is almost always there for clothes shopping. And that's why, when I'm in 10th grade, I will take my dad with me to pick out a prom dress. And when I get engaged, my dad will be there to help me pick out my dress. I want to please my father. I would consider that a good thing if I were you.

I can't please the world, and I won't always please my dad. But the thing is... I try. I try when I can fail so easily.

I'm a person who comes to disappoint a lot of people, and very quickly. I'm clumsy, I'm not the smartest. But my dad loves me either way, and is proud of me.

I want him to stay proud. So I'm going to work at it.

I'm shy enough on my own outside my house, and I don't need to be shy around my own blood.

My dad deserves a good conversation from me. And one day I will end up showing him this... he might like that it's been kept a secret for a while.

And with that, I encourage each of you to try, try as you might to please your parents. You don't have to do what they want you to do. If you don't want to be a doctor try to tell them. But please them in a way that you can.

Whether it's your: Father, step-father, foster-father, adoptive-father, mother who is caring as a father and a mother, or sibling, or even someone who doesn't legally have you as their own.

Fathers try to be fathers. They want what's best.

They don't have to always call you sweetheart. But when it comes to a man who won't listen as a father. Ask him to listen for just this once to hear you out. It works, even the slightest bit.

Try. Try to change your atmosphere.

Things will get better for you.

Less guys going and breaking your heart, and less guys just hurting you in general.

Be courageous. It'll help.

I'm shy, maybe you aren't or you're worse than I am. Be courageous, you can do it if you just believe in yourself. You are your own enemy.

Try to be a frienemy. You can be a friend but sometimes your enemy in a good way.

If you need advice or help I'm here... sometimes it's good and sometimes I may not understand but...

I believe in you...

And Good luck!~Me and my dad.