After shallow rendezvouses, I grew up and I decided to move out for college. Not in a dorm, but in an apartment near my college. I've seen this advertisement online for an apartment with two roommates: a girl who just graduated, and one who just started college. It was my sophomore year. I decided to move out of my dorm because I had pretty much fought the only three people I knew there. Tatiana cheated on me, Lena broke my heart and Caroline was just unbearable.
It was time to finally start being an adult and get an apartment of my own. And two other people,in this case.
The girl who was my roommate had a beauty I've never seen before. She had this kind face that made me feel safe and protected by looking at her. She was always smiling. Her personality definitely made her only more beautiful. Her name is Mackenzie, Kenzie for short. She's three years older than me and this intrigued me. It's always good to know this type of people because they've practically already been through what you're going to go through and they can give you good advice.
She was often flirty with me and I never understood why. I guess she liked me, but I don't feel like I'm the type who someone could flirt with. I'm a socially awkward nerd. I wish I was kidding. Sometimes in social occasions I spice it up and crack a few jokes. They're always offensive,for some reason. I'm working on becoming better in these situations. She's an extrovert type,who knows what to say at the right time. If we're going to judge her by her looks, she's way out of my league. She's out of anyone's league. I'd say she's a 9 out of 10. Tens don't exist. Everyone has flaws. Her flaws were being sometimes creepy and bad hygiene habits. You can't be a 10 and have oily hair and smelly armpits. Anyway,after our relationship I realised I had major mommy issues. My mom has always been the passive aggressive type, the one who could make any enviroment toxic. The one who has random arguments with store cashiers. A literal Karen. Growing up, I often would fantasize about the perfect family. I never met my dad, so a paternal figure wasn't even in an hypothetical world in my mind. The perfect mother would be accepting, calm, supportive and not a workaholic. Kenzie had most of these traits and a mom body. Not in a bad way,obviously. She would always cook for me, drive me to college, clean me up before classes, do my laundry and basically treat me like her child. It was cute in a way,because I was in a very dark period of my life and she made me feel a lot better. It was kind of dumb, but it worked. After a few months of being in a relationship with her, my depression started being more bearable. I didn't think about suicide that often anymore and if I was sad I could talk to her.
In the end, I fell to my old dumb ways and broke up with her. I still hate myself for every breakup I decided to have. I know that a relationship isn't gonna last forever, so I quit it fast. Usually after 6 months. Objectively,it's not much time. Many couples stay together for a decade before breaking up. I don't want to waste my youth on one person if I know damn well that it's not the one I want to spend my whole life with.
Let's say that I also don't believe in spending life with one person only. I'm not a polygamist,don't get me wrong. Marriage is one of the concepts that are so far from my lifestyle. Not because I'm gay and it's technically illegal in most countries,but because throughout life,people change and two people who are in constant evolution don't go well together. As you change more and more, you're going to find yourself having so many disagreements with your partner,which commonly end in divorce. Maybe after 2 years or maybe after 13. I don't like wasting time on people.
This literally happened to me. Not with Mackenzie. I used to know a girl for 5 years, since I thought I knew her well we got together. She ended up being a lot different than I thought. I think that when you're basically forced to spend much time with someone,when you're in a relationship, you start seeing people from a different perspective. The real them,not the concealed version they show to everyone in public. That's the version you usually fall in love with.
It's 7 am already. I need to get up so I can get ready and go out. Go out for what? Smoking marijuana. Yes,in the daylight.
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Do Soulmates Exist?
Romance20 year old Heather has an unexpected meeting with a girl who'll change her life. Are they really meant for each other? They have to figure that out.
