Truths, Lies and Bilgesnipes [Complete]

Bonus Oneshot: Loki & Thor Post- Ragnarok

Story Summary: Thor thought he had grown out of his childhood stutter long ago, but to his distress, the speech impediment resurfaces shortly after he's crowned as king of Asgard. Loki tries to cheer Thor up.

Author's note: I've been meaning for post this on WP for a while, but I don't have a cover drawn up, so I'm going to throw it in here for now (for good? Idk).

This one was an attempt at fluff (a failed one?) and an experiment to test run how to run a character with a stutter, but it ended up touching on Thor's psychological breakdown between Ragnarok and Endgame, which was fun. Just want to note, also, that this fic is not meant to represent every person with this sort of speech disorder. Everyone experiences and deals with it differently.

Shadows Of The Past Yet Loom

It began with one word. Or rather, the hesitation that preceded it.

The pause between "Good morning" and "Bruce" was a fraction too long as Thor registered the hard B sticking around his mouth — like dried jam clinging to the corners of his lips — and cringed away from the inherent, tactile nastiness of it, but forced the word through nonetheless. Bruce's name came out with a clear, ugly, triple repetition of the B.

Thor gave it no further thought. Everyone stuttered and stammered sometimes. Besides, as far as he could tell, Bruce had been preoccupied with pouring out a glass of water for himself and hadn't even noticed that Thor had misspoken.

Except, that dodgy B wasn't a one-off. Bruce was a morning person and he liked a good chat over breakfast as much as he liked the food. Ordinarily, Thor was much the same, but as they worked through their meals, he found himself less and less aware of the plate in front of him and increasingly focused on the sounds coming out of his mouth. Or, to be precise, what was failing to come out of his mouth. He gave up on "Bruce" — the mere thought of that B had the muscles in his neck tightening up. And the letter P was no more cooperative, both at the start and in the middle of words, which was doubly infuriating.

Infuriating and, at the same time, left his chest seizing up with cold dread and humiliation. He was a full-grown adult, a warrior whose name was known across many worlds and the newly crowned King of Asgard. He couldn't go about sounding like a frightened child. The stuttering and the stammering and the overly long silences had been embarrassing enough back when he actually had been a frightened child.

And yet, as he emptied his glass and rose from the table, he fell apart once again, "Ah, are you still going to b-b-be at the council me-meeting...." There he caught himself. He felt the next word block approaching on the letter T in "today" and hurried to dodge it. "Uh, that is, this afternoon?"

"If you think my presence will be useful, I'll be there. But, Thor, are you all right?" Bruce replied. He straightened his back and peered up at Thor with a searching expression.

Thor shrugged and fervently hoped that he wasn't blushing. Of course, Bruce had noticed that Thor sounded like a halfwit this morning. Anyone in possession of a working pair of ears would have noticed. "I'm fine. Just fine," Thor said quickly. "See you later then."

What, in all the worlds, is wrong with me today?

# # #

Had it been only Bruce and the rest of Thor's circle of friends listening to him, he might not have cared overly much about the chaotic whims of his throat and mouth. He might have even tolerated Loki mocking his faltering speech patterns with a fake smile and a light-hearted smack across the back of Loki's shoulders. But the ship was full of Asgardians who looked to him for leadership and guidance. And they expected him to act and sound like a king.