First There Was You

Chapter 44: Elle

August 5

Loon Call Island, Lake Rosseau, Muskoka

Standing in the shower, I tip my head forward, resting against the smooth glass. It's been all I can do to hold my racing thoughts together today.

I can tell Greyson is concerned by my mood, he's been not-so-subtly testing the waters there since yesterday when we drove down to the city. I'm not sure how much longer I can hold these secrets in, these feelings in, but it's not my place to tell him.

But if he ever finds out I knew, and didn't say something, will he ever forgive me? Hasn't everyone else in his home life broken the fragile trust he already has?

A pit of nausea settles in my stomach, and my chest tightens as the familiar pressure of stress crushes down on me. I know I have to get out of the shower eventually, but I'm not sure I can handle facing him right now.

Mads has provided the perfect cover, deciding to host a summer party with Theo at the last minute, taking advantage of his empty cottage and the absence of all our parents, who are visiting Wes and Logan at camp. Even Ry and Sarah will be here soon.

A soft tap at the door jars me from my struggle to pull myself together. "Elle, everything okay in there?"

"I'm fine, I'll be out in a minute." I take a few deep, settling breaths, forcing everything I'm feeling to the back of my mind, compartmentalizing before I shut the water off. I quickly dry off and slide into a matching lingerie set, hoping my attire will distract Greyson from trying to talk about my mood again.

Even though I'm nervous to strut out of the bathroom in my magenta, lace lingerie set, it's better than facing any real form of communication at this point. I can help but shake my head at the brutal irony of this situation, begging Greyson all summer to open up, then doing a complete role reversal, where now I'm the one keeping secrets, hiding from him.

Taking a deep breath, I open the door, wandering out into my bedroom. "Did you need something?"

"Can we talk about the past few days, is everything okay with us?" Greyson's back is to me as he speaks, which tells me silently how nervous he is over his quesiton. But as soon as he turns, his eyes widen, then squeeze shut as he chokes on his soda. "Jesus, Elle. Give a guy a heads up."

His eyes don't leave my body as he sets the can down on the bedside table, stalking towards me, pulling me into his embrace. "We should cancel going out tonight, definitely. I'm not going to be able to do anything except imagine what you've got on under whatever pretty little dress you'll be wearing tonight."

"That's just too bad for you, then, since I have every intention of going tonight. I guess you can just stay home and take care of yourself." The look of shock that crosses his face makes me smile.

"God damn Theo. He's been putting ideas in your head again, hasn't he?"

"Well, either him or Vi, I'll leave it to you to figure out who could be this diabolical."

His groan vibrates through me as he drops his lips to the top of my shoulder. "That's not fair, I know Theo can be this diabolical, but I don't know Vi at all, really." He twirls his finger at me, "This definitely feels like a woman's touch though."

Laughing, I shrug, wiggling in his arms. Happy the direction we've moved away from a serious topic. "Let me get ready, I need fifteen, twenty minutes tops. When will Ryan be here?"

Greyson looks at his wristwatch, "Uh, about the same. I guess I'd better grab a shower, too."

I wrinkle my nose at him, nodding. "Probably a good idea."