Daisies • Zarry

18. Brooklyn

New York City during the holiday season was unlike anything Zayn had ever seen before; the bustling crowds of people flocked the streets, rushing around to buy gifts for their loved ones, old men dressed as Santa on every street corner ringing bells, Christmas music blasting from every store you walk by, lamp posts lit up with lights and not to mention the giant Christmas tree in Rockefellar Center. As Zayn and Elias walked hand in hand down Fifth Avenue partaking in some last minute shopping that Elias had suggested, Zayn didn't feel the holiday spirit like he usually did.

There were too many people everywhere and everything was too expensive and all he had was what little spending money his mom sent him every week, which was just enough for the necessities. He was the sort of person who normally made people gifts, like a drawing or some type of art, or he bought them something small and simple, useful, but Elias was persistent in being Zayn's personal ATM machine and Zayn just wasn't feeling great about it; it made him feel like a charity case.

"It's really not necessary for you to pay for everything," Zayn commented as they made their way toward FAO Shwartz, and Elias stopped walking, turned right and tried dragging Zayn with him to enter the store, but Zayn pulled his arm back.

"Please, I don't need anything in there," said Zayn.

"Why are you being like this?" Elias questioned. "It's really no big deal to me. We're dating, and what's mine is yours. If you want something you can have it, Zayn. I'm just trying to help."

"I know but can't we just window shop or something? You've been trying to buy me shit all day and I keep telling you that I don't want it," Zayn responded gruffly, beginning to feel frustrated that Elias wasn't understanding him. "I just don't care about expensive, material things."

"But it's Christmas," Elias replied, rolling his eyes. "You get people gifts at Christmas and this is like, the best shopping district. It doesn't have to cost a thousand dollars I'm just..." he added, trailing off. "Never mind."

"I appreciate your generosity, but this just isn't my thing."

Zayn knew that he and Elias came from different worlds and it never seemed to be a problem for Zayn until then. Every store on Fifth Avenue were high end stores and Elias could just go into Armani and buy a pair of sunglasses like it was nothing, and maybe at first Zayn was impressed by it, but the more time he spent in mid Manhattan that afternoon, the more Zayn started to hate it.

He wasn't impressed with the bougie stores or designer labels and he knew that if he bought his mom some Burberry bag that she'd know it wasn't from him anyway. He looked around at the tall buildings looming above him and the cars whizzing by, honking incessantly as a woman barreled passed him, smacking him with her Chanel bags as she talked on the phone and he groaned. At least in the Village he could stumble upon some small, quirky shops, a good used bookstore, and the record store next Gold Star. But not here.

The more Zayn thought about his relationship with Elias, the more he started to question it. Elias attended Whitman on a full ride, completely paid for by his dad, while Zayn's mom had to take out student loans just to send him there. Elias' lived in an apartment paid for by his dad and had a swanky car, designer clothes, only ever providing Zayn with five star meals and everything was just so easy for Elias. All Zayn had to do was date him and he could have anything he wanted.

There has to be something wrong with me. Who wouldn't want this?

"So what's your thing then?" Elias asked, stopping in front of Saks. "Just sitting in the back of Daisies reading a book?" he added, his tone sounding irritated.

"Are you trying to pick a fight with me right now?" Zayn shot back, furrowing his brows. "That was uncalled for."

"I'm not trying to fight with you, it's just that every time I try to take you anywhere or do anything for you it's never what you'd prefer and all you ever do when we aren't hanging out is just go to that coffee shop as if it's the only place that exists in this city."