Living With Internet

Living With Internet; part 9

Author's Note:
So this chapter is gonna be in a different POV other than Dan, Phil or Lily, and includes some Kickthesticks for all of you in the fandom :)
~ceiling_phan

PJ's POV:
"Hey Chris?" I turn to him, shifting in my seat slightly. We're riding home in a cab to our apartment after hanging out with Dan and Phil, but for some reason everything felt weird. "Mm?" Chris looks up from his phone at my words. "Did you notice anything weird with Dan tonight? He looked like he had been crying." I ask, but Chris just looks confused.

"No, but I thought Phil was acting really strange. He kept staring at me the whole night, and he kept touching my arm weirdly. You don't think he... likes me do you?" Chris looks worried and turns to me. "I hope not, I always thought he and Dan were kind of together, you know? Do you think we should've told them? About us?"

"I don't know PJ, I'm not sure I'm ready, to tell people yet." I nod, agreeing with him. It was only yesterday when we confirmed our relationship. And truthfully, I was still even unsure of what we really were.

**flashback to the night before**

I rest my arm against the edge of the sofa and attempt to turn my thoughts and vision away from Chris. It's bothering me that I can't tell him how I feel, but I can't seem to get it out of my mind.

I shift my weight again, this time I lean towards Chris. He just smiles lightly at me before turning back to the television, completely unaware of the burning desire I have to tell him everything.

For the past few months, I have been battling with myself over how if feel about Chris. It's been over a year sine he moved in with me last November, and we tell each other every thing. You'd think if be able to sort out my feelings, tell him, or get over it. But it turned out to he much harder than that.

It wasn't until last night that I decided it was time to really to tell him. Tell him that I was gay, and had feelings for him. And of course I knew it was risky, I knew it could ruin our relationship. But there was that little bit of hope I held onto, the one that told me he might like me back. So I woke up this morning, ready to tell all, but he was distracted and I could never catch him at the right moment. It wasn't until right now, on this couch, that I actually felt I was going to say it. I had to.

When I move again, Chris finally turns to me. "Is everything okay PJ? You keep fidgeting". I swallow hard and turn towards him, now allowing my complete attention on him, trying not to get too caught up in his eyes or stare at his lips. "Actually" I start, my heart feeling like it's going to burst, "There is something I need to tell you Chris. I- I love you." It comes out as a near whisper, but he still hears me. And for what seems like an eternity nothing happens.

Eventually he turns back, tears forming in his eyes. "I thought you would never say it." he breathes, suddenly grabbing my waist and pulling me into his lap. I slide my arms around his neck and tangle my fingers in his hair. It all feels so natural. Our faces are so unbearably close now and I can feel his hot breath against my skin. And suddenly our lips collide. His mouth is even softer than I imagined, and it fits perfectly into mine. All at once everything seems unimportant and I wish I would never have to breathe again, so I could stay right here forever. When we break away we're both heavily breathing, our lips swollen from the kiss.

And it's not awkward. Chris just smiles and we both blush. He reaches down, tangling his fingers with mine and pressing his soft palm against my own. We lay there, my head resting on his chest, Chris rubbing circles on the back of my hand, for the rest of the night. The last thing I think of before I drift off into sleep is the thought that everything was so perfectly perfect.

For now.

I suddenly snap back into reality from the daydream about last night to find Chris waving his hand in front of my face. "PJ? You there? We're home." I snap my head up and step out of the cab. He meets me on the other side of the car, joining our hands together again and kissing my temple gently.

If everything was perfect, why did I feel so uneasy?

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Foreshadowing? Maybe ;)
That was the first kissing scene I have ever written, I apologize for how bad it was ;-; . But yeah some Kickthesticks for you guys, maybe some Phan action will be approaching soon!
Look out for that!
~ ceiling_phan xx