The Perfect Storm

Chapter 10 - I'm Sorry

Kiana's POV:

"What?" I finally breathed out, after what felt like hours of me just staring at him. I swear no one else would've notice his slight change in aura. But I did.

"Oh, god, it's too soon. Isn't it?" He mumbled to himself, his smile dropping. With his head in his hands, I could hear the hurt in his voice.

He couldn't love me. No. No. No. He was just confused. Yeah. That's all he was.

I couldn't let this be another Derek. He told me loved me and then he let me go. He made me what I am, and then he left like it was nothing. Like I was nothing.

"No," I whispered so lowly, I thought he was unable to hear me.

He looked up slowly, but surely.

"No?" he asked, prominence in his shaky voice. Suddenly, my heart dropped.

"I- I," I couldn't say anything.

I stood there, hands shaking. Losing breath, I sat down on his unmade bed. I shut my eyes, feeling tears prick at the corners.

I couldn't stand it. Being in there, breaking him.

I can't do this.

I can't myself get hurt again.

I stood up, my body wavering. I kissed his cheek sweetly. I opened his door, looking at him again.

"I'm sorry," I whisper, a tear falling. I lingered there, watching his eyes. I shook my head and left.

Later:

I went to Chris' and my secret place. It was an enclosed grassy space with filled with wildflowers, some stones, and a small brook.

I collapsed onto the clover beds. I felt my bones go numb. My brain waves were at a complete stop. I don't know why, but I felt some sort of feeling. It was eating at me.

Maybe I was the one hurting him. Maybe I was wrong. But I knew that I didn't not like him. Maybe I loved him, too. But right now, I needed to release all of these emotions.

I screamed out in frustation. My shaky voice shattering into the air, and echoing against the spruces.

I heard footsteps behind me, and I shot up. I hid behind the large rock, gripping on it tightly as if it would protect me. Could it be a homeless person that must've wandered in here? Maybe it was a kidnapper, ready to take me at any moment. He was going to steal me away, forcing me to be apart of his fantasy that I was his. (A/N: I watch too much Criminal Minds, sorry.)

Fear immediately radiated through my body, and the pace of my heart quickened. Scenes of myself in different scenarios of myself tied up, forcing to do things that I didn't want to.

Other than the numbness in my head, the only thought was that someone was going to take me. Good thing Chris told me to keep something to defend me at all times. Especially on the street, where people were always seeking ways for excitement.

I took my pocket knife out, having it ready. The person grew closer as I slid open the blade. I could feel the person a few feet away from the stone. He murmured something, but I couldn't make out what it was.

I closed my eyes, before jumping out from behind the rock, ready to strike the person.

I flinched as I swung my arm, feeling a tiny slice just to scare the man away.

He screeched, "Kiki! What the fuck?!?" It all sounded too familiar.

Oh shit.