Blue Star Reviews [CLOSED]

CoronaVirus

Author : @Juani_tryde

Reviewer : girly_blush

Cover:

The cover wasn't that attractive. As you know, the cover is the first thing which attracts a reader to check the book, you could have made some efforts to make it elegant and appealing.

Title/Blurb:

The title wasn't uncommon. In fact, there were many stories with the same title. Even though it suited the storyline, you could have named the story with something which invites a reader to read the book.

The blurb seemed to be too short. It lacked the main aroma of the story. A bit more explanation or a narration of the plot would have made it more innovative. You should work on the blurb.

Plot:

Bernadette was a teenage girl, whose parents were doctors. They used to stay away from due to their job. She was looked after by Lucy, her caretaker, from childhood itself. She had a simple life which includes her small circle of friend and school. And her life takes a turn when Novel Corona Virus hit her country and everyone was forced to stay inside the house.

The plot wasn't so unique or interesting.

Storyline/Creativity:

As I said earlier, the storyline wasn't uncommon. Nowadays, writing about the coronavirus and the quarantine love story is a trend.

In your story, you have well managed to weave out a teenager's thoughts and excitement well.
Bernette was a girl who couldn't get much love and attention from her parents. Lucy was her caretaker, who looked at her every need. The relationship between Lucy and Bernette was framed well. I liked the way how you craved Bernette's school scenes and the conversation with her friend, Adrian. Bernette's emotions and loneliness when she understood that her parents can't make it at her own birthday party were appreciatable.

While reading the story, I felt like the narration was breaking the flow of the story. You should work on your narration. Like, try to present and depict everything in a unique and impressive manner. That would help. Also, try to describe each and every scene in a quiet way.

I have only read the story till you updated. Hope there will be twists and turns which will surprise the readers.

Dialogue/Grammar:

The story was written in the first person's narrative manner. So, it helped a reader inside me to understand Bernette well. Sentence formation was good. You have used italic and bold letters to highlight some scenes. That was good.

Grammar was good. It was smooth and was written in a simple language. But there were severe punctuational mistakes which could have been avoided by proofreading. Even though you have written the story in the present tense, in some areas you wrote the past tense. That was a serious mistake.

Payment :

A permanent follow and shout out for the review book.

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