Damn This Is A Full House [JJBA Villains X Reader]

👌goddamn beautiful men

You got up feeling well rested, which is abnormal for you, normally you just sleep in until 1:00pm but this morning you got up at 6:00am (✨good job✨)
You decide to take a long steamy shower to congratulate yourself.

           {20 minutes later}

You were in the middle of shampooing your (H/L)(H/C) hair when you hear a loud crash in the living room (not the bathroom cause that would be weird) "oh fuck-" you hear a deep, almost moist, voice breathlessly say as another male sounding voice shushes him. You quickly turn off the water and grab a towel to cover your thicc figure (sorry, I got a sickness for the thiccness)
You dry yourself speedily, knowing that if you catch whomever is outside in the living room is going to get the shit beaten out of them with your chancla. You wrap the towel around yourself, tightening it, and step out of the bathroom. Bewildered at how many really well built men are in your living room, you hold your chancla in a defensive manor "who are all of you and where did you come from?" You ask aggressively pointing the chancla at the blonde guy licking at his lips looking down at you like a snack.
"Well I am DIO, everybody should know who I am, even you peasant" DIO said in a familiar moist voice.
"Hey! You're the guy who swore in my house!" You say throwing the chancla at him, it bonks DIO on the head and the blonde male falls to the ground dramatically. Another blonde guy with a dino tail comes up and kicks the drama king in the chest, "get the hecc up you vampire fuck boi!" "ZA WARD-" another swift kick in the ribs.
A decent looking blonde in a purple suit comes forward and introduces them all, "those four stripper looking men over there are Kars, Esidisi, Wamuu, and Satana" he points over to the skinly clad men in the corner talking to each other in their own language, 'they do be hot tho' you think to yourself before the guy in the purple suit continues, "the blonde on the ground is kinky vampire DIO and the blonde kicking him is Diego..." He paused and looks at your hand for a split second "...And I am Yoshikage Kira, I am 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I occasionally drink. I'm in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn't lose to anyone."
Everyone in the room stares motherfuckerly at Kira before you speak up grabbing their, "I am (Y/N) (L/N), and this is my house that you guys crashed into. I have two roommates (Rm1/N) and (Rm2/N), they are going to be so pissed at me! They went out to get some Chinese food and trusted me to keep the house clean. And you guys broke a heccing wall down!" You yip at them angrily, a sorry look has made its way on to a few of the taller males faces. Then as if time had stopped, you're frozen and so are the others except for DIO who decided to get coochie points by fixing your wall. DIO gets back in his spot on the floor as time unfreezes, "hoe, your wall was never broken" DIO says coldly in his moisty amber voice. You look at where the wall used to be broken and then back at the blonde, 'how did he do that???' you question to yourself only for your thoughts to be interrupted by one of the skinly clad males that were over in the corner. He had grayish skin and long adorably messy red hair with little black horns poking out of his head, "Ms. (Y/N), Lord Kars and master Esidisi wish to speak with you for a moment" he takes your hand to follow him to the corner where the others are, you swear you can see Kira's eye twitch for a moment when Satana grabbed your hand. The first one to speak when you got to the corner was the tallest one. He had a tanner skin tone than the others, his white hair looked so fluffy and soft, his outfit choice was weird but you got used to that when you've seen the crackheads at Walmart "Ah, Ms. (Y/N), I am Esidisi" The poofy hair male leans closer to you "the second in command, but Kars will never admit it" he stands back up "so from the chitchat going around, everyone here has no idea where they are. If you could tell us, that would be great" "okay, listen Esidisi, this is a house that I bought with my buddies
(RM1/N) and (RM2/N) in (H/T)." You say feeling colder, realising that you're still in only a towel "um, I'm going to be right back, I forgot my clothes in the bathroom" you awkwardly walk into the bathroom and lock the door. You can hear them talking on the other side, muffled but still hearable.
"So, we're in (H/T)" you hear Esidisi's rumbling voice ring throughout the living room, Kars chimes in, "Apparently so... One of you non-pillar men should ask her if we can stay here as it's the only place we know, right now" murmurs of the men deciding who should ask flood the house. You finish up putting on your clothes, you are wearing your (F/C) turtle neck and some black sweat pants to fight off the chill air of autumn. You step out of the bathroom to see your roommates looking at the well built men in the living room, "(Y/N) what is the meaning of all these hot guys being here!?" (RM2/N) yells at you with her face all red, obviously blushing from their hotness, while (RM1/N) gets yeeted into oblivion for booping Kars on the nose.
Kira has made himself a cup of coffee and sits down on the couch, while DIO is flirting with (RM2/N) and they're totally falling for it, Diego has found your Zen garden and started eating the rocks from it. The pillar men have shifted over closer to you and started taking notice to your details from your (H/L)(H/C) hair that you actually brushed for once to your deep, beautiful, (E/C) eyes. Your button nose to the dimples on your cheeks. How your curves line up to your clothes.
"Ms. (Y/N)" Satana continues "do all girls look like you?" you were about to answer when you here another loud crash and a pained grunt soon after. It was (RM1/N), "learned not to boop Kars, huh?" You playfully stated,
"(Y/N) I think I need to go to the hospital..." your roommate said as they were in agony. (RM2/N) chimed in, "LMAO nerd! Just get an ice pack"

               {2 hours later}

You found out that these buff men will be living with you and your roommates, which might be a problem, you don't have enough room in the basement for them all. So two of them are going to room with you... And your roommates decided for you.
You sigh, guessing DIO and Kars would be sharing your room. You don't want that pervy vampire near you, let alone living in the same room you keep your personal things in. It's already bad enough that (RM1/N) barges in without knocking, but now you have more people to worry about.